Black Dawn
by Green-Eyed-Wolf9324
Summary: Kiana is Jake's younger sister. Being the 11yr old that she is, and the younger sister of an Alpha wolf, it's not always easy, especially when going through changes that not many girls can say they go through. Contains spanking. Don't like, be respectful and continue on.
1. Cause You Had A Bad Day

Summary: Is it? Can it be? Another Jacob/Sister spanking fic? Well, I guess so. It's not always easy being the younger sister of an Alpha Wolf. Especially when puberty isn't the only transformation you are going through.

Chapter One:

I stood outside school, looking around for any sign of my brother, Jake. Usually I could hear him coming from a mile away, on his motorcycle. Most of the time, he was already here, or at least had someone here waiting for me. It was raining, and my long black hair was starting to plaster itself to my face, my clothes becoming wetter by the second. A small group of my classmates walked by, huddled under three umbrellas. They waved to me, yelling good-bye's, and see you tomorrow's. I waved back, giving a small smile. They split up, going their separate ways, either onto their bus, into their parents car, or meeting up with an older sibling to walk home. Most of the kids at La Push Middle School didn't live to far away, and the high school was close enough that the older kids would meet up with the younger kids and walk home. Some of the high schoolers walked with the middle schoolers because they lived on the same street, and in La Push, everyone looked out for each other. It was a small town, and everyone knew everyone.

"Kiana," I heard my teachers voice and I turned around to see her walking up beside me, holding her umbrella so it covered both of us. "Where's your brother?" she asked. It wasn't like Jake to leave me hanging at school like this.

"I don't know." I told her, glancing down the road. I grabbed the straps of my backpack and hoisted it up higher on my back. I had an awful lot of books in there, and it was getting heavy.

"Would you like to go in the office and give him a call?" she offered, and I shook my head.

"It's okay. I'll just wait for him here."

"You should go inside. Wouldn't want to catch a cold, would you?"

As she said that, a fancy looking car pulled into the parking lot, and my stomach dropped. I knew whose car that was, and I was not pleased to see it. It was Renesmee's car.

"There he is." I said, trying to sound cheerful. I thanked my teacher and made my way to where the car stopped by the curb. I slid into the back seat to find Jake looking apologetically at me from the drivers seat, and Nessie sitting in the passenger seat.

"I'm sorry, Kia." He said when I closed the door behind me. Instead of replying to him, I folded my arms and looked out the window. Of course the reason he was late was Nessie. Ever since Jake imprinted on Nessie (she insisted on being called that), when she was "born" three years ago, Jake's entire life has been devoted to her. First he was her caring brother figure, then he was her friend, and then he was more than a friend. I didn't care what he was to her, I only cared that she took him from me. I hated her for it. "Don't give me the silent treatment." he pleaded. I tightened my arms across my chest even more, and turned my face further away from him. "Kia," he said warningly.

"Please leave a message after the beep. Beeeep!"

Jake inhaled deeply, holding it for a moment, before turning to face the front and exhaling. He shifted the car into gear and pulled away. I watched the school disappear as we drove away. I knew where we were going, and I wasn't happy about that, either. We were going to the Cullen's. I didn't mind the Cullen's. I actually liked them very much. Alice and Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle. Even Edward wasn't so bad. Esme of course was always kind to me, and I could never say anything bad about her. However, Bella and Rosalie were hard for me to get a long with sometimes. When Nessie and I had been the same age about two years ago, I used to fight with her very often, and of course Bella being her mother, and Rosalie the over-protective Aunt, didn't look on that very fondly. They obviously know I don't like Nessie, because Edward can read thoughts, and Jasper can sense feelings. I mean, I'm only eleven, I can't control what I think and feel all the time.

Jake doesn't really know I don't like Nessie. I never said anything to him, and neither did Edward or Jasper. They respected my wishes when I told them not to say anything, which really meant a lot to me considering I'm only eleven.

Having Nessie around was especially hard when our father died a year ago because of a heart attack. I had gone through a long period where I wouldn't talk to anyone. The only person who understood was Edward. He could hear my thoughts and knew exactly what I was going through. He knew that I resented Nessie for getting a lot of Jake's attention, but I would never say that to Jake's face. Edward knew that I felt betrayed and abandoned, not only by my mother and my father, but also by Jake. That was worse, because he was alive. My parents were dead, so they had no choice but to not be around anymore. Jake had the choice, but he just didn't understand.

"Do you have any homework tonight?" Jake asked me, breaking the silence in the car, and my thoughts. I nodded. Being in sixth grade meant homework practically every night. I hated homework, but Jake said that I had to do it. So I did it. Most of the time.

Since our father died, Jake has been taking care of me. He stepped into the role as my guardian without a second thought about it, or any worries at all. It was almost as if nothing had changed in our relationship, except that what he said, was final, unlike before, when I had my father to go to if I didn't like what Jake said. Usually, my father would sway Jake, and I would get what I wanted. But I couldn't do that anymore.

Jake is more strict than my father was. I think it is because of the fact that Jake is an Alpha, and is a leader by blood. I mean, my dad was strict and all, but he was easier to sway than Jake. Jake is like a rock. What he says goes. If I break a rule, I get punished. It's as simple as that.

"Do you want to do it at the Cullen's, or do you want to save it for when we get home?" He asked. I shrugged. "Kia, I said I was sorry. You can't give me the silent treatment forever."

I didn't say anything. I could too, if I really wanted.

We pulled into the Cullen's driveway, and I made to get out of the car, but Jake hit the lock button.

"You're not getting out of this car until you talk to me." He said, turning to look back at me. I narrowed my eyes at him. Nessie looked to Jake then back at me.

"I'll let you two talk." She said, giving Jake a quick peck on the lips before unlocking her door and getting out of the car. I could as easily unlock my own door and just walk out, but I knew it would make Jake mad, and I didn't feel like making him mad right now. I was the one that was mad. Jake looked expectantly at me, waiting.

"So what were you two doing?" I asked grumpily. "Strolling along the beach?"

"What does it matter what we were doing? What matters is that we were there." Jake countered.

"You were late." I huffed. "I'm all wet now, because I had to wait for you."

"Why did you just wait inside?"

"Because I was looking for you. I thought you would be there faster. By the time I realized you weren't there and you weren't coming, I was already wet."

"I'm sorry." Jake said. "I am, Kiana. Can you please forgive me?"

He pushed his bottom lip out and gave me the puppy dog face. I did that to him all the time, and he started doing it to make fun of me, but realized that when he did it when I was mad, it would make me laugh, because he looked so ridiculous, and could hardly stay mad at him.

This time, I tried to keep a straight face. I glared at him through narrowed eyes, by my lips were twitching, and I could help the smile that finally spread from one ear to the other.

"Jake, stop." I protested. "I'm mad at you!"

"Then why are you smiling?" He asked, reaching back to tickle my leg above the knee. I jumped, pushing his hand away, squealing. "Huh? Now you're laughing? Is this what you call mad?"

"Jake, stop!" I whined, trying not to giggle as he continued to tickle me. I pushed his hand, away again, and when it found contact with my knee, I pushed it away harder. "I said stop!" I snapped. Jake stopped, suddenly looking reproachfully at me. I could feel the tears making their way to my eyes, and looking down into my lap, frustrated. Why was it that whenever I was mad at him, he always turned it around so that I was laughing it off? It was frustrating, not being able to be mad at him, while he could be mad at him and decide when he was done being mad.

Jake turned away from me, and unlocked the doors. I sat in my seat, still glaring into my lap as he got out and made his way to my door. When he opened it, he grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the car. I stood there as he knelt down in front of me, holding my arms to my sides.

"I understand you're upset with me for being late, but this is too far. You cannot be this upset over me being late."

"Yes I can." I pouted. Jake shook his head, disagreeing.

"No. There is something else bothering you. What is it?"

"Nothing."

"Don't lie to me, Kiana." Jake warned.

I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to tell him that I was mad that he was late because he was with Nessie. It's not like he didn't spend enough time with her as it was. Why was she the reason he had to be late? I wouldn't have cared if it was Pack stuff. But Nessie stuff? That hurt. I had to think of something quick to tell him. I thought of something, which wasn't a lie. It was something that upset me today, and I figured I could spin it off into something that would make him believe me. Even if it meant putting my butt on the line. I was more inclined to put my butt on the line, then express to Jake my true feelings for the love of his life, just yet.

"I got an F on my History test today." I mumbled. Jake drew his brows together.

"That's. . . That's it? That's what's bother you?" He asked.

"Jake, I studied for an hour, every night for the past week for that test! Remember? You were the one that made me do it!" I stomped my foot.

"Yes, I remember." he said. "Instead of being mad at me though, you should be focusing that energy on finding a way to do better on your next test, don't you think? I understand you studied for an hour every night, but maybe you need to change the way you study."

"Maybe if you helped me, I wouldn't suck so much."

"Don't put this on me." Jake warned. "You are accountable for your own grades."

"But I tried so hard!" I whined. I did, I really wanted to get a good grade on the test. I wanted Jake to put it on the fridge like he did with my other test's that had A's on them, just like dad used to do. "It's not fair."

"What's not fair, is you taking your anger out on me." Jake replied. "And you didn't even say hi to Nessie. What did she do to deserve the silent treatment too?"

There we go, back to Nessie.

"I'm sorry." Well, it was half true.

"I'm sorry, too. Now can we hug already?" he held his arms out and I stepped into them, bending slightly to rest my head on his shoulder. I loved hugs with Jake. They were always warm and he was so big that he enveloped me completely. I always felt safe with Jake. "Let's go inside. Everyone is waiting for us." Jake said into my hair. I nodded, and stepped away.

We walked up the front steps, into the Cullen's house, which was large and fancy. It was very opposite our house, which was small and cluttered. We went upstairs into the living room, where Nessie was sitting on the couch with Bella and Esme. They were talking in low voices, too low for me to hear, and stopped when Jake and I entered the room.

"There she is!" Esme smiled, standing up and coming over to kiss the top of my head. "We were wondering if you were ever going to get out of that car."

I knew she was just trying to make me feel better, but I also knew that they probably heard every word Jake and I said to each other. I looked across the room the Jasper who was sitting by a pile of paper that Alice was making into a paper chain. He met my gaze and winked. I dropped my backpack on the floor and began heading over to them.

"Kia." Jake said, and I stopped to look at him. He gestured to my backpack and I gave him a "What" look. He tilted his head to the side and gave me the look. The Alpha look that said, if you don't do it now, I'm going to make you. I exhaled loudly and went over, making a show of grabbing my backpack up and placing it in a less obvious place. "I don't know what has gotten into you," Jake mumbled, shaking his head as he went over to Nessie.

I clenched my jaw and stalked over to Alice and Jasper, plopping down on the floor beside them.

"Hey, Kia." Alice smiled, offering a roll of tape and some paper to me. "Want to help?"

I nodded, taking the paper and tape from her. By the time I connected about two hundred paper rings together, Jake had decided he had enough of Nessie for one night (or at least that was how I liked to look at it) because he came up behind me and gently ran a hand through my hair.

"Ready to go, Kia?" he asked. I nodded, placing my last ring on the chain, and putting it on the floor. I waved good-bye to Alice and Jasper, then grabbed my backpack from the floor. Nessie walked with us to the door, pulling my brother in for one last kiss.

"See you later." She said to him, then waved to me. "Bye, Kia."

It was weird, having her as a friend before, and now having her as my brothers boyfriend. I mean, I was never really great friends with her, but we used to play together for a while when we were the same age/size. Then she grew up, and I didn't.

I gave her a lame wave, then walked out of the door to the car that Jake had driven there earlier. I got into the passenger seat and waited for my brother. When he got in the car he turned it on and started driving away before saying anything to me.

"When we get home, I want yo to start your homework, okay?" he said. "Emily is going to come over tonight and watch you while the Pack has a meeting." After Jake assumed his role as lone wolf, then became Alpha of is own pack, Sam gave up his title to Jake, only in agreement that Sam was second in command. Jake still carried the most power though.

"What? Jake, I want to go to the meeting!"

"Kia, it's a school night, you can't." He told me.

"But last time you said I could go! You promised!" I argued. I had been to a few meetings before, but the last one I wasn't allowed to go to, and Jake said that this time I could go.

"Last time, I didn't know that our meeting would be on a school night. You're not going, and that's final."

"That's not fair!" I shouted, tears springing into my eyes. This whole day was terrible. Nothing was going my way and I was tired of it. "You can't do that, you can't break a promise, Jake!"

"I'm sorry, Kia, but I'm not letting you go to a meeting on a school night. It starts late enough as it is, it'll be near midnight by the time it's over, and you have to get up at six. Did you forget that your bedtime is nine?"

I hated having a bedtime.

"That's not fair!" I insisted, starting to cry. Leah always said I cried when I wanted to get my way, and Embry said I cried because I was an emotional person. Jake said it was a combination of both. "You always do this! You always promise me something, then break it!"

"Kiana, when it comes to your safety, and education, I'm willing to break promises. Yes, I know I said you could go. Yes, I didn't realize it would be on a school night. Yes, I'm sorry and I feel bad that I have to leave you behind, but there will be more."

"I want to go to this one!"

"Why? What is so special about this one?" He asked, his tone slightly sarcastic.

"You said I could go, that's what! I've been waiting!"

We crossed the boarder into La Push.

"Well, you're just going to have to keep waiting."

I inhaled a shaky breath, tears still falling out of my eyes. I couldn't believe he was doing this. The last meeting was over two weeks ago, and now I would probably have to wait at least another two weeks before the next one.

"You're so mean." I told Jake, spitefully as we pulled into our driveway. I snatched my backpack off the floor of the car. "You're so mean and I don't want to look at you anymore!"

I wrenched the door open and ran inside, skidding down the wooden floors of the hall to my room, where I slammed the door behind me. I flung myself onto my bed, crying into my pillow. How could Jake be so mean to me? He knew how much I loved going to the meetings. Ever since the Volturi came for Nessie, there hasn't been much going on, but because the Cullen's still live near, we occasionally get another kid turn. There hasn't been a kid turn in a little over a year though. Jake thinks that there will be another one soon.

"Kiana" I could hear Jake's voice outside my door, but I covered my hands over my ears.

"Go away!" I yelled, my voice muffled by my pillow. "I don't want to look at you Jake! I'm so mad at you!"

It was times like this that I wished I had a sister, someone who I could talk to and would understand my feelings. I mean, Jake did pretty good most of the time, but he was a boy. He didn't always understand me the way a sister would. I asked Dad once, if Mom hadn't died, if they would have had another kid. He looked really sad when I asked him that, and said he didn't know. Then he wheeled himself away and that was the end of that.

"Fine." Jake sighed. "But you better start your homework. Emily will be over in an hour and a half. I want your homework done by then, understand?"

I didn't have much homework tonight, I only had some math problems and a short story to read. It wouldn't take me more than thirty minutes to do. But I was too mad at Jake.

"Fine!" I snapped back, though I had no intentions of doing my homework. I listened for his footsteps to retreat, and when they did, I wrapped my arms around my pillow and curled up into it, sulking. Today was just not a good day. I was having a lot of those lately. Bad days and emotional waves that would just make me crazy. Leah said it was because I was at the age where I might be hitting puberty. I think she's wrong.

I stayed in my room until I heard the doorbell ring, and Emily's voice drifted down the hall. I got up from my bed and went over to my desk, quickly pulling some of my school stuff out of my bag and making it look like I had been doing homework the entire time. A soft knock sounded on my door and Jake poked his head in.

"How's it coming?" He asked. I shrugged my shoulders, pretending to read the story. "You almost done?" I nodded. There was a moment of silence, and then I heard my bedroom door shut. I looked behind me, thinking that Jake had left, but he was walking towards me instead. I turned back around, looking down into my papers. I was still mad at him, and would be mad at him until he decided to let me go. If he didn't let me go, I don't know if I could ever not be mad at him again.

"Kia, don't you think enough is enough?" He asked me, putting his hand gently on the back of my head. "I'm sorry that you're upset with me, but I'm not going to change my mind."

"I know you aren't. Because apparently it's against the rules for me to be happy."

"That is a lie, and you know it." Jake told me. "So you can stop being a drama queen."

"Don't call me that."

"Well, it's true." he insisted. I turned to glare at him.

"Well sometimes you can be a real asshole, but I don't say it!"

"Ex-What did you just say?" Jake demanded, taken aback.

"You heard me! I'm not saying it again."

"Oh, you better not." Jake said, narrowing his eyes at me. "You know exactly how I feel about you using that kind of language."

"And you know exactly how I feel about you keeping promises." I countered.

"I'm serious, Kiana. Knock your crap off, now. We're not having this discussion, you're not going. The. End. If you don't drop the attitude, and get out into the living room in ten seconds, I will have no problem letting my hand finish this discussion, with your butt. Understand?"

I clenched my jaw, fighting against the tears of anger and betrayal that threatened to break the surface, and glared at him.

"One. Two. Three. Four."

"I"m not a baby!" I protested. "You don't have to count!"

"Seven. Eight."

I pushed back from my desk and stood up, making my way to the door with footsteps that weren't quite stomping, but not light, either.

"Attitude." Jake warned as I opened the door. I ignored him, making my way down the hall into the living room where Emily was standing. When I saw her, she smiled kindly at me, and I couldn't help but run over and hug her. I had known Emily for a long time, and she was very kind all the time.

"What's wrong?" she asked, concerned, when I buried my face into her side. Jake was short before he turned, but then he grew really tall. I was just short. One of the shortest kids in my class.

"Jake promised me last time that he would let me go to the next meeting." I sniffed. "Now he's saying I can't go because it's a school night!"

"Oh, honey." She said, hugging me tighter. "Jake just wants what's best for you."

"But he _promised!" _I stressed the last word, looking up into her face and blinking innocently through my lashes.

"Kiana, enough." Jake had followed me out of the bedroom, and was now looking at me with stern eyes. "If I have to tell you again, we're going to have a problem."

I let out a huge sigh and crossed my arms, plopping down onto the couch.

"I'll call you if I think the meeting is going to go any later than twelve." Jake said to Emily as he grabbed some rope so he could tie his clothes off to his leg. He walked back around the couch, bending over to give me a kiss on the head. "Be good for Emily, you hear me?"

"I hear you."

I liked Emily. I wouldn't ever be bad for Emily, because I liked her too much. She respected me and I respected her. I couldn't say the same for Leah though. If Jake ever had Leah watch me, I'm sure there would be plenty of bad to go around.

"I love you, kid." he said heading for the door.

"Love you too." I mumbled, trying to sound as miserable as I could while I said it. He closed the door behind him, and a few minutes later I heard the sound of his howl, calling the pack together. Emily came over and patted my leg.

"Why don't we start making dinner?" she suggested. My stomach rumbled, right on cue.

"Okay." I said, getting up from my spot on the couch. I might as well enjoy Emily's company. Clearly, there was no way I would get to that meeting.

**Well, what do you think? Reviews are awesome, and you are awesome! So, just for some feedback, what do you think she should do. Stay home like the good sister she is, or sneak out to the meeting like the bratty eleven year old girl she is? **


	2. Rush

_Into your head, into your mind_  
_ out of your soul, race through your veins_  
_ You can't escape, you can't escape._

Chapter 2:

Emily and I made spaghetti and cheese toast for dinner. It was my idea to make the cheese toast, something that Jake had taught me when I was a kid. It was really good, and even better with the pasta. We talked and listened to music while we did it, and she got me out of my bad mood. I was laughing and smiling with her before I even knew it. It was never hard for Emily to make anyone happy. She was just that type of person that was so nice and kind, that you couldn't help but be happy around her.

"Emily, I have a question." I said, swallowing my mouth full of toast.

"What's that?" she asked, giving me her full attention. That was another thing I liked about her.

"If Jake and Nessie ever get married, can I come live with you and Sam?"

Emily burst out laughing. "I'm sure we could work something out." She winked at me, then pointed to my plate. "Now finish up. Jake said you need a shower, and then bed at eight thirty."

"What?" I asked. "Eight thirty? But my bedtime is nine."

Emily shrugged and looked apologetically at me. "I'm sorry, honey. But Jake specifically told me to have you in bed by eight thirty tonight."

It seemed as though my good mood had disappeared immediately. I knew what he was doing. He was punishing me for giving him an attitude today. If there was one thing I hated more than a bedtime, it was an early bedtime. It was already quarter to eight, so that meant I had about forty five minutes to finish eating, shower, and get into bed. Which meant I probably wouldn't get to my homework either.

While I was cooking with Emily, I figured I would do my homework before bed. I guess that wasn't going to happen now. The only light I had in my room was the light on the ceiling, and Emily would know for sure I was up because the light would seep under my door. I needed to get a flash light for stuff like this.

"Emily, please, can I stay up until nine? We don't have to tell Jake!"

"I can't do that, Kia." Emily said gently, shaking her head. "Jake is trusting me to watch you and follow the instructions he left behind. I'm not going to compromise that by doing something that could potentially get you, as well as me, in trouble with him."

"I'm the only one that ever gets in trouble around here, I think you'd be fine." I grumbled, pushing my spaghetti around with my fork. I had lost my appetite rather quickly. Emily gave me a skeptical look, but it was true. I was the only one that ever got into trouble. I had to be careful what I did around everyone of my brothers friends, because if I took one step out of line, Jake would know about it the next time they shifted, unless they were really good at managing their thoughts.

One time, I skipped school a few weeks after my dad died, and went to the beach. Seth happened to go jogging by and saw me. He promised he wouldn't tell Jake that he saw me, but a few hours later, Jake had gotten a call saying I never showed up at school, and thinking that something happened to me, called the pack together. It wasn't long before Jake found out where I was, and what Seth promised. Jake yelled at Seth real good, and gave him a weeks worth of patrolling that no one would want to get. Jake gave me a real good spanking. He dragged me home, lecturing me the whole way about how we had to look out for each other now, and I was reckless for skipping school and going to the beach by myself.

That spanking was probably the worst spanking I ever got from Jake. He made my backside glow red, and I didn't even have any undies on either! I cried the whole time, bawling my eyes out, telling him my butt was gonna fall off. Jake was so mad at me, but he was so scared too. We had just lost out dad, and he was afraid he lost me too. I knew he was being serious, because when he was done spanking me, and he stood me in front of him, he had tears in his eyes. The thought of anything happening to me was too much for him to bear, he said, and if I ever did anything like that again, he would make what just happened feel like a few love taps. I felt so bad that night, that I stayed curled up against him on the couch until I fell asleep, promising him that I wasn't ever going to leave him.

I sighed and pushed my plate away from me. "I'm not hungry." I said, standing up. "Can I go shower?" Emily nodded sympathetically at me.

I put my plate on the counter and trudged into the bathroom. After dad died, Jake took his room a few weeks later, and also acquired his own personal bathroom. Now, the bathroom I used to share with Jake, had only my shampoo and soaps. I even got to decorate it with flowers on the walls to make it look a little nicer. Alice helped me with that. She helped me paint my room too. It was pale pink, with lilac flowers on it. I liked flowers. They were pretty, and smelled nice. Jake always joked and said I was like a flower, pretty and good smelling.

I turned the shower on and hopped in. We had our own well out back, which held a lot of water, so I didn't have to rush when I showered. My friend had a small well and her family was only allowed to take five minute showers. I took a fifteen minute shower, letting the water rush over me. It was nicer than the rain water that was dripping down me earlier.

I toweled myself down then blow dried my hair so it wouldn't dry funny in the morning. I brushed my teeth, like Jake always had me do before bed. Somewhere along the line, Jake learned good dental hygiene. It must have been from my mother when she was alive. Jake had super white teeth, and he never had a cavity. My teeth weren't too bad. They weren't nearly as white as his, and I had a cavity last time I went to the dentist.

Emily was sitting on the couch, reading a book that she brought with her, when I got out of the bathroom, towel still wrapped around me. I made my way into my bedroom and put on a pair of pajama pants and a tee shirt. They used to be Jake's when he was a kid. They were black sweat pants and a white tee shirt that was pretty worn looking.

When I was done getting dressed, and putting all my school stuff back into the bag, it was eight twenty five. I went out into the living room and sat down next to Emily, resting my head against her shoulder. She used her hand to pat my head, and smiled down at me.

"All set?" she asked, and I nodded solemnly. "Let me tuck you in?"

Emily loved to tuck me in when she baby sat. She would be a great mother someday. I went into my room and climbed into bed. She pulled the covers up to my chin, smiling happily at me.

"You have everything ready for tomorrow?" she asked me . I contemplated telling her that I had some homework to do still, but I knew that if I did that, she would make me do it, and then would have to tell Jake that I went to bed later. Then Jake would probably spank me for lying to him about doing my homework, and for not doing it because I was mad.

"Yes." I said, snuggling deeper into my bed.

"Good girl." She said, planting a kiss on my forehead. "I'll see you tomorrow. We're having a big dinner at my house."

"Really?" I asked. I loved having dinner at Emily's. Usually when she had dinners, most of the pack was there and it was always a lot of fun.

"Yes, really."

"I'm excited." I said, feeling a little more optimistic about tomorrow.

"Good. Me too."

She stood up and went over to my door, flipping the light off.

"Good night, Kia."

"Good night, Emily." I smiled. She left, closing the door behind her.

I laid there in the dark silence, wondering what was going on at the meeting. I tried not to think about it, and closed my eyes, but my curiosity got the better of me, and fifteen minutes had passed, in which all I was thinking about, was the meeting, and not being any closer to sleep than I was when I laid down.

The Pack was probably sitting around a nice bonfire on the beach, talking and discussing wolf stuff. They were probably joking and laughing and having a good time like they were the last time I went. I wanted so bad to be there. It wasn't even that far away.

I thought for a second, wondering. . . Maybe, if I went over there for a little bit, and came back before anyone could notice my disappearance, then I could be a part of the meeting. But I would have to hide out of sight so that no one could see me, and be extra careful not to make noise. Their hearing and eye sight wasn't as great in human form as it was in wolf form, but it was still better than the average human.

I pushed my covers down, slowly getting out of bed. I could hear the TV on in the living room. I tip-toed over to my closet and pulled out a pair of old sneakers, since the ones I was currently using were by the front door. I slid them on then went over to my window, pushing it up with difficulty. Our house was old, and the windows and doors tended to stick sometimes. I opened it just enough so that I could slip through and onto the grass outside, then slowly shut it, before taking off towards the beach.

Part of me was screaming this was a bad idea, and I had to go back now. If I got caught, my life would be over. Jake would be beyond pissed at me for sneaking out and putting myself in danger. The thought of what he said when he spanked me for skipping school actually stopped me dead in my tracks. That was a bad spanking, did I really want to endure an even harsher one if I got caught? I looked back to the house, contemplating returning.

But if I was sneaky enough, and hid well, no one would know I was there. They would all be too busy with the meeting stuff to even notice I was there. Okay, I thought, pointing to the house, eenie, meenie, miney, mo. I ended up pointing to the beach, and nodded my head once. Yes, I was going to do this. I continued on, walking on the side of the road near the trees. When I got closer to the beach, I began weaving in the trees, making my way for the light of the bonfire and the distant sound of boys voices getting louder and louder. When I got close enough to see them, I slowed down, pausing behind a tree before making my way to the next.

When I could hear what they were saying, I stopped moving, and leaned against the tree, listening.

"-last time they didn't know what to expect. They came, thinking that they were going to have to fight, and kill her." Jake's voice made it's way to my ears, and I rolled my eyes. Of course, he was talking about Nessie. "This time, they just want to check in on her, see how she's doing. I don't know about you guys, but I'm not buying it. I'm not going to let them get anywhere near Ness without me, and at least six of you guys around in case something happens."

"You know we got your back, Jake." Seth said from where he sat across the fire, motioning to himself and Leah, who nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, us too!" Jared said, motioning to him and Paul.

"We're in." Quil said, Embry nodding his head.

"Thanks guys." Jake said. "It's not that simple, though."

"What do you mean?" Leah asked.

"Alice had a vision before I even knew about this visit. I found out today when I was over there." That's probably why he was late picking me up from school. "If we're not there, Alice's vision is of the Volturi coming in peace, but leaving with one of them. They aren't coming to fight, but they plan on taking a Cullen back with them. You remember hearing how Aro wants to collect those with special powers, and the Cullen's are full of specials."

Good, I thought. Maybe they'll take Nessie and I could have my Jake back.

"But," Jake continued. "Once I found out, and started planning on bringing a group of us there to keep things under control, Alice's vision changed. We don't know exactly what it is yet, but if we go, something is going to happen. Something bad. The Volturi won't leave happy, and there will be blood."

There was silence around the circle as they all took this in. I felt a small shiver pass through my body. The Volturi were terrifying. They were pale, cold, and mean. When they came for Nessie, I was sent to stay with Emily while two of the new wolves guarded the house. Not that they thought we would have a problem, but just for precaution. We were after all, wolf girls. We could be used as leverage any time against the pack.

"So, what do we do, Jake?" Embry asked. "Should we stay? Or should we go." I smiled, his words reminding me of a song.

"I don't know yet." Jake replied. "Like I said, there is no way I am letting Ness face them without me, but I'm reconsidering bringing you guys along. Maybe if it's just me, it will be okay."

"And if it's not?" Leah demanded, her voice harsh. "Jake, if Alice had a vision that everything would be fine, and the only problem is they'd be leaving with someone, why don't you just let them do it themselves? They're vampires, they can take care of themselves."

"I'm not going to do that, Leah." Jake stated firmly.

"So you're willing to put her at risk just so you can be there to protect her from something you don't know might happen?"

"Jake, Leah's right." Jared piped up. "Maybe it's best to stand this one out. I mean, we can always be close by without being in the middle of it."

"That's a good idea." Sam agreed. "We all know how you feel about Nessie, Jake. Quill and I especially. But I think you really need to consider not getting involved in this one."

Jake was quiet for a moment as he thought. I knew he was probably thinking that they were right, but he was so obsessed with Nessie that he probably couldn't stay away from her even if he tried.

"I'll think about it." Jake said slowly, "and tell you all my decision tomorrow at dinner."

There was a murmur of approval around the circle.

"So, when exactly are they coming?" Paul asked.

"They're arriving Saturday morning and planning on staying for the day. Aro wishes to talk with Nessie about her past three years. Nahuel is coming up as well with his Aunt. Aro wants to compare their stories." Jake's voice had an edge to it, as though he didn't approve of this. "They're arriving tomorrow night, along with the Denali clan who are coming to be supportive."

There was a small groan around the circle.

"More vampires? Seriously? We're going to start sprouting again!" Seth complained, meaning that with all the new vampires, we might get new wolves.

Jake didn't respond to that.

"Wait, Jake-" Seth said, seeing something on Jake's face that I couldn't. "You don't think-"

"Yeah." Jake said, his voice clipped. "I do."

"Ugh. Like we need anymore wolves around here." Leah groaned. She was still the only female wolf, and hated it.

"I have a feeling," Jake said, his voice slow and laced with an emotion I wasn't quite sure of, but it didn't sound good. "That you aren't going to be the only girl in the pack once this all plays out, Leah."

"Really?" Leah asked, giving him a hard look. Jake nodded. "Really." she said again, smiling. "Well it's about time." she looked at Jake and stopped smiling instantly. "What? What is it?" she asked concerned.

"Jake, what's wrong?" Embry pushed. There was a slight pause before he said, "You don't think. . .No, it couldn't be. She's only eleven."

My heart seemed to drop into the pit of my stomach. What? Was he talking about me?

"What?" Leah half shrieked. "Jake! Kiana? You think Kiana, is going to turn?"

I watched the back of my brothers head intently, my breath coming in slow rapid spurts.

"Yeah," He said, his voice heavy. "I do."

I gasped, clasping my hand over my mouth. Paul's head snapped up, along with Jared, Embry's, and Quill's. They were all looking in my direction, senses straining.

"What was that?" Paul said, standing up. "Who's there?"

I turned away from them, my back against the tree, pressing into it, willing my self to be invisible. I want to go home, I want to go home, I thought. I never should have come out. My heart was pounding so hard and fast, that they could probably hear me all the way at the fire.

A hand came down on my shoulder and I screamed, startled. Sam was standing there looking down at me with reproachful eyes. I stared wide eyed back up at him, my hands moving from my mouth to my heart where I felt like it was about to jump out of my skin. His eye brow did the most subtle quirk of disappointment, and I did the first thing that came to my mind.

I tore out of his grasp and ran straight back the way I came. I had to get out of there. I didn't make it far though, before Jake's voice stopped me dead in my tracks, my entire body shaking.

"Kiana Black." He yelled after me, his Alpha voice on full command. I'm sure the Pack could feel it's backlash as they sat uncomfortably around the fire. "Don't you dare take one more step."

I turned around to see him standing at the edge of the woods, his stance menacing and ready to jump into action should I make a second break for it. I could feel my body quake just looking at him. I was in deep trouble, and it scared me. I wanted to just sit down where I was and cry. He crooked a finger at me, keeping contact with my eyes the entire time. I knew I had no choice, so I slowly began making my way over to him. When I reached the spot where I left Sam, he grabbed hold of my arm and dragged me a lot quicker than I was originally going the rest of the way.

He let go of me right in front of Jake, and I was already looking at my feet by then. I could practically feel the anger radiating off of him. He was pissed and I knew it. There was no way I was going to survive the night.

Jake took a step closer to me, bending down so that his lips were close enough to my ear, that I could feel his breath when he said,

"Apologize to the Pack for disrupting our meeting, then sit your sorry ass on that log." I glanced up into his eyes through my lashes and jumped when he said, "Now." in a more forceful tone. He straightened up and stepped back, forcing me to step forward. I looked ahead of me to all the expectant and stern looking faces. It was no mystery that I was not supposed to be here.

"I'm sorry," I said in a whimpy voice after taking a deep breath, unable to make it any louder.

"Not good enough." Jake growled, urging me to continue. I had my hands clasped together in front of me, picking at the skin around my finger nails, a nervous habit.

"I'm sorry I disrupted your meeting." I blinked and a tear fell down my face as I lowered my gaze back to the ground, quickly sitting on the log, afraid that Jake might take a swing at my butt in front of everyone. That would be so embarrassing. I don't think I would ever be able to face any of the Pack again after that. There was a moment of tense silence before Jake spoke again.

"We're going to have to reschedule this meeting for tomorrow night, after dinner. Sorry, guys." Jake said, trying to keep his voice level.

"That's alright, Jake." Embry said, getting up, the rest of the Pack following. They didn't waste any time in getting out of here. In a minute they were all gone, Sam included. I could see him taking his cellphone out, probably to call Emily and let her know what just happened. I felt even worse, knowing that Emily would find out that I snuck out while she was watching me.

Jake was still standing behind me, arms crossed over his chest. When the Pack was out of sight, I turned to look at Jake.

"Jake," I said, panic in my voice.

"Quiet." He snapped, uncrossing his arms to grab my arm and pull me up from the log. I tripped over my feet as he pulled me along, heading back to the road. I could feel tears spilling out of my eyes like there was an endless supply.

"But Jake!"

"I don't want to hear your excuses."

"It's not an excuse!" I cried, tugging at his arm. He was gripping me so tight it hurt. "Ow, Jake, you're hurting me!" He loosened his grip, barely, still walking swiftly with a purpose.

"I don't care, I don't want to hear anything out of you."

"Jake, I don't want to turn!" I sobbed, and I could see his face twitch. "I don't want to turn Jake, I don't!" I was panicking.

Jake stopped walking, spun me around with my hand, and landed a particularly painful swat to my backside. I gasped, looking up at him with hurt eyes.  
I was scared, and he was telling me to be quiet.

"I said, be quiet, unless you want me to spank you right here. Because I am _this _close to doing it. Don't. Push. Me." He held my gaze for good measure, before turning and stalking back down the road, towing me along. I began sobbing, terrified at what I just heard and what was about to happen.

Honestly, I didn't know what I was more afraid of. The fact that I was possibly going to turn this weekend, or the fact that I wasn't going to be able to sit for a month. I mean, the spanking would suck, but the wolf thing would last much longer.

Jake ignored my crying the entire way home, and barely acknowledge Sam and Emily as we passed them leaving our driveway. I looked into Emily's disappointed face, opening my mouth to say something, but she silenced me by shaking her head and looking away. I drew in an uneven breath, having a hard time controlling my breathing.

"Go to your room." Jake said as soon as we entered the house. He didn't have to tell me twice. I booked it to my room, closing the door behind me and collapsing onto my bed in a bawling mess.

Sam, who was like an uncle to me was disappointed. Emily was disappointed. But most of all, Jake was livid. Not only did I know that by the way he acted, but it took him an hour to come knocking on my door. It took him an hour to calm down enough to come into my room, and even then, he still looked mad.

I looked up from from my bed, my face red and puffy from crying. He was holding a wooden spoon from the kitchen in one hand, and I could feel my stomach fill up with dread. I had only felt the wooden spoon once before in my life, and that was by my father when I was six and smashed half of our good china during a fit. I could still remember to this day how much it stung.

"Kiana," Jake started in a firm voice.

"Jake, I'm so sorry!" I gushed retreating further back on my bed, until my back hit the wall. "I promise I'll never ever leave the house without permission again!"

"I'm going to make sure of that, Kiana." Jake said, coming to stand beside my bed. "Because what you did tonight, you can _never,_ do again, do you understand me? I can't believe how foolish you are! There was a reason you couldn't come tonight!"

"You said it was because it was a school night!" I accused, fidgeting with my fingers again.

"Yes, because that was part of the reason! But there were also things that needed to be discussed tonight that you didn't need to hear! Things that I didn't want you to hear."

"I'm sorry!" I wailed, placing my face in my hands. "I messed up!"

"Yes, you did." Jake confirmed and I felt my bed sink down as he sat in front of me. "You could have been hurt, Kiana. You didn't know what was going on at that meeting! You had no idea what you could have been walking into!"

"It was just a meeting, I didn't think-" I began, attempting to defend myself, removing my hands from my face, but Jake cut me off.

"That's right, you didn't think. You acted on impulse to get what you wanted. You couldn't handle the fact that you didn't get your way, and like a spoiled brat you put yourself in danger and broke some major rules in the process!"

"But-"

"No. Enough. You are done talking. It's my turn."

**Woo. Chapter two. Glad those of you who reviewed like it so far. **


	3. Really Did It This Time

_I guess you really did it this time,  
left yourself in your warpath,  
lost your balance on a tight rope  
_

Chapter 3:

"Kiana, I don't think I have words that could possibly describe how incredibly disappointed I am in you, right now." Jake said after a moment of silence. I stared miserably down into my lap, hating to look at his face as he said that to me. "I thought you were raised better than this. You're a smart girl, Kia, but you let your wants mislead you into making very poor choices, sometimes. Choices that have consequences to them. You know these consequences, and you know which choices you make, are bad ones."

Jake's finger pressed up against the underside of my chin, tilting my head up so that I was looking into his eyes.

"I was your age once too, Kia. I understand that sometimes you just don't think things through properly. But just like you, I also had to face the consequences of those actions. I learned from them. You will learn from them as well. It may take a few times of messing up to get the point. But you can bet your bottom that I will be there to help you learn." he finished firmly, staring into my eyes. It was such an intense stare that I had a hard time keeping from looking away. "Do you understand?"

"Yes, Jake." I said quietly. "I understand."

He nodded slowly, "Good." He pointed to the floor in front of him. "Up."

I pleaded with my eyes, giving him the best puppy dog look I could.

"Kiana Rose, don't make me ask again."

I resisted the urge to point out that he didn't ask me to get up, but rather ordered me to. My stomach was filled with the jitters as I clumsily climbed out of bed and stood before him.

"You have a pretty long list of misdeeds for today, don't you?" I nodded, biting my lower lip. Was he going to spank me for all of them? "For your attitude earlier today, I was going to have Emily send you to bed early. However, you had your own agenda, and clearly, that is not going to happen. So tomorrow, and the rest of the weekend, you will be in bed no later than eight, with lights out." Tomorrow was Thursday, which meant that I would be going to bed an hour early for four nights in a row. Jake could see the gears in my head turning as I thought this out, and said, "Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, Jake." I sniffed.

"Now, you snuck out of the house to go to a meeting that you were specifically told you weren't allowed to go to. So, one, you disobeyed me, and two, you put your life in danger by leaving with no one with you or knowing where you were going. This is the real issue here, Kiana. I can look past a little attitude now and then. But this? I can't. I won't. Putting your life at risk just to get what you want, is not worth losing you, or something happening to you. Do you understand me?" he asked, his tone sounding more angry. "And I will not let you continue to think that it is acceptable."

Jake reached out and pulled me over his lap, his strong arm holding me down by my back.

"Do you remember what happened last time you put your safety at risk, Kiana?" Jake asked as he placed a finger in the waist band of my sweats and pulled them to my knees so that just my panties were covering my bottom. I closed my eyes, tears falling rapidly down my cheeks. I was scared now, stuck with no turning back.

"Uh-huh." I sobbed.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Jake asked, placing his hand warningly on my butt.

"Yes, Jake!" I said louder. "I remember. Jake, I'm scared!"

"Good. You should be. I hope after tonight that I never have to spank you for this again."

_Swat, swat, swat, swat._

Jake began spanking me, his large, tough hand practically covering my entire backside with one swing. There was always a difference between being spanked by my dad, and being spanked by Jake. My dads hand had more of a sting to it, but Jake's hand felt like a paddle. I bet it was because when he turned, he got so big and muscular. He also worked on cars and stuff, so he had tough hands anyway. When dad was alive, Jake rarely spanked me. After Dad passed though, he was the only one to discipline me when I misbehaved. It was that terrible though, most of the time.

This, however, was. By the tenth swat I was yelping with each one.

"Ow, Jake. Please! It hurts!" I whined, kicking my legs up in attempt to relieve the pain. The only thing I was doing was getting in his way.

"Put your legs down." He commanded. When I hesitated too long, he slapped the back of my thigh. I forced my feet back to the floor, gasping at the sting, and then sobbing into my bedspread. Jake continued reigning smack upon smack on my backside and I cried and cried. I knew I deserved it, but it hurt so bad.

"Ahhh, oww. P-please, Jake! I'm s-so sorry!" It was difficult to get the words out between the painful smacks. He placed a particularly sharp smack to my right sit spot and my hand shot back immediately as I let out a yelp followed my a sob. "Oww-wahhh."

Jake's large hand caught my wrist and pinned my hand to my back.

"Are you ever going to put yourself in danger like that again, Kiana?" Jake asked me, his voice calm and firm.

"N-no, Jake! Never!" I replied, pushing against the bed with my free arm as I tried to twist away from the smacks. It didn't help much, and I didn't make it anywhere.

"Are you going to go behind my back and do something I specifically tell you not to?"

"No, no, no! I promise! I am sorry, Jake!" I wailed. "I'm sorry!"

I collapsed into the comforter, my free arm snaking around Jake's back in an awkward, one-armed type hug. I squeezed him tight as he aimed several smacks in a row on my sit spot, before he stopped. I lay there, crying and snotting into my bed. Jake placed his hand gently on my burning butt and gave it a gentle pat.

"I'm going to make sure you remember this lesson for quite a while." Jake told me, and I could feel him twist as he retrieved the wooden spoon from beside him.

I pushed myself up off his lap before he even had a chance to hold me down again, and threw my arms around his neck, sobbing into his shoulder as I attempted to speak.

"Noooo, Jake, please! I'm so scared! It hurts so bad already!"

"It's supposed to hurt, it's a spanking." Jake said gently, and I was glad that instead of pushing me away, he wrapped an arm around my waist and placed a hand on the back of my head, stroking my hair. "A very well deserved spanking, if I might add."

I pulled away looking into his face the best I could through my tears. He used his hand on my head and brushed the tears away with his thumb.

"Do you hate me now?" I asked him, a question that popped into my head while he was lecturing me.

"What?" Jake asked, "No, of course not! Kiana, I could never hate you, so don't even think for a second that I could. You are my sister and I love you to death, no matter what you do."

"I just wanted to make sure." I said gently, using my hand to wipe my face.

"Well you can take that thought right out of your head before I spank you for being so silly." he told me.

"Okay."

Jake looked at me silently for a moment, then said, "You ready to finish up?"

"Do we have to?"

"Yes." Jake guided me over his lap again. "I'm going to give you ten with this wooden spoon. I want you to keep track, because on the ninth one, I want you to promise me something. Now pay attention to what I want you to say," he instructed. "I want you to say, I will not put myself in dangerous situation. Got it?"

"I got it." I said, grabbing a small fistful of the comforter beneath me. Jake placed his arm around my waist again, holding me in place. I bit my lower lip, waiting.

_Whap! _

The first smack with the spoon landed, making me jump and squeal. The second one landed with just as much force.

"Oww! Jake stop! I can't do it!" I yelled, wincing as the third one hit right on my sit spot.

"You will do it." Jake told me, landing the fourth one as he did so. I hitched my breath, crying. Every connect of the spoon to my butt was like a fire being lit over already raw flesh.

When the ninth one finally came around, it was on one of my sit spots, and much stingier than the others.

"Ahhh! I-I. . . I will not p-put myself in danger. . . dangerous situations!" I sobbed, and the final swat landed on my other sit spot. I let out a wail, glad that it was finally over. It felt like it lasted for ten minutes, when in reality, I had probably only been over Jake's lap a total of two minutes. I cried into the bed, the fire in my butt reaching an all time high.

"I'm sorry!"

"I know, Kia." Jake said soothingly, rubbing my back gently. "Let this be a lesson, okay? One that we won't have to repeat."

"Never again, Jake!" I promised, my entire body shaking as I cried my heart out into my bed. Jake let me stay there for a little, then guided me to my feet. It was almost ten thirty now. Jake placed his hands on either side of my face, wiping my tears, before planting a soft kiss on the tip of my nose, then standing up. I let him guide me into bed, laying down on my tummy. Jake slipped my sweats the rest of the way off my legs and pulled the covers up to my waist.

"Let's aim for a better day tomorrow."

"Jake," I whispered, terrified at what was about to come out of my mouth. "I never did my homework tonight."

Jake groaned and ran a hand over his face.

"Really, Kiana?" he demanded, though his voice was more resigned than anything.

"I'm sorry, Jake! I was so upset!" I told him, new tears springing to my eyes. "Please don't spank me again."

Jake knelt down by my bed and leaned in close.

"I'm not going to spank you again, Kia." He assured me. "But you will be getting up early tomorrow morning to do it. And it's already late, so you better fall asleep quick."

"Okay." I said. That was something I could live with.

"I love you." Jake whispered to me, brushing my hair away from my face.

"I love you more." I told him, placing my hand over his and hugging it to my chest. When I let go, he stood up and made his way towards the door.

"Stay in bed." He warned, before turning off the light. "Good night."

"Good night." I replied back, already yawning. It wasn't long after that, before I was sleeping. . .

_I was running through the woods, my heart beating faster than ever. It was dark and I was alone, running from something I couldn't see. There was no sound of pursuit, only the noise of my feet on the ground. Terror filled me, making me run faster through the familiar woods, where the beach appeared before me. _

_I ran out of the woods, stopping at the end of the water, falling to my knees, trying to catch my breath. I looked around, and there was nothing. But something wasn't right. I leaned forward, trying to ease the ache in my chest, when I saw my reflection in the water. But no, it wasn't my reflection, it was the reflection of a wolf. A russet wolf, that looked like Jake, but had darker fur, and my eyes. When I opened my mouth to scream, the wolf's mouth open, and a long, terrible howl came out of it.  
_

_"Noooo!" I yelled in my head, but it was only a wolfs howl that came out. I went to smack the reflection away with my hands, which had turned into paws. I screamed.  
_

"Noooo!"

"Kia!" I was being shaken awake by a pair of rough hands. "Kia, wake up!"

My eyes flew open and I was in my bedroom, laying in bed covered in sweat with my brother sitting over me. I sprang up, throwing my arms around him, shaking. He tightened his arms around me, rocking gently.

"Jake!" I whimpered, clutching at the fabric of his t shirt.

"It's okay, Kia. I'm right here." he soothed. "It was only a dream."

"No, it wasn't. It wasn't a dream, Jake. It was real. I was a wolf!"

Jake paused in his rocking, before continuing with it and stroking my hair.

"I don't want to be a wolf, Jake!"

"Shh," Jake hushed, and I buried my face into his shirt. "We don't know for sure if you'll even turn. But if you do, I'll be there with you the whole time. You don't have to be afraid."

"It's not just the turning that I'm afraid of. If I'm a wolf, I'm never going to be normal again! And I'm only eleven!"

"I know, baby." Jake said, using a nick name he rarely called me. Especially not since I was younger. "Believe me, if there was a way I could make sure you never turned, I would. But there isn't. Unless I send you away."

"I wont!" I said instantly. Changing or not, I would never leave Jake.

"That's what I thought." Jake smiled into my hair. "I'm never going to let anything bad happen to you, Kiana. You're my baby sister."

"And you're my Jake." I replied, tears brimming in my eyes. "Always, mine." Not Nessie's.

Jake lowered me back onto my bed, leaning over me. He brushed the hair away from my face and kissed my forehead.

"Can you go back to sleep?" he asked, glancing over at my clock. "It's two in the morning. You have to get up in three hours."

"Only if you stay with me." I told him.

"Alright, roll over." Jake said. I rolled over onto my stomach, wincing slightly as my butt ached at the contact. I had almost forgotten about that. It wasn't too bad though. I got comfortable, resting my head on my pillow, and Jake began rubbing slow circles on my back. It was comforting, something he hadn't done since the night my dad passed away. He sat in my room with my all night, rubbing my back as I cried. He let me cry, occasionally giving some soothing words, but not once told me to stop crying, even though I cried until five in the morning before I finally fell asleep, exhausted.

I closed my eyes, content. The fear and panic I felt when I awoke from my dream had ebbed away, now leaving me with a small feeling of apprehension. It wasn't too bad though, and soon, I fell asleep.

~ . ~

"Kiana, let's go!" Jake urged as I pushed the food on my plate around. I was so tired, that after doing my homework, all I wanted to do was go back to bed. "You have to be to school in twenty minutes and you haven't even finished your breakfast."

"I'm too tired to move any faster." I whined, putting some eggs in my mouth and chewing slowly. Jake was getting ready to go to work. He worked at a garage as a mechanic. He loved to work on cars.

"Well if we don't leave in ten minutes, you're going to be late, then I'm going to be late. If I'm late, my boss is going to throw a fit, so let's go."

I let out a frustrated sigh, but complied, and picked up the pace with my eating. I shoveled my eggs into my mouth then took three big bites out of my toast.

"Done." I said as I chewed it. Jake had left the kitchen and was in his bedroom, getting one of his work shirts. It was a blue color that buttoned up the front and had his name stitched onto it. I tossed the last bit of my toast into the garbage and put my plate in the sink.

"Ready?" Jake asked, coming back. I nodded, grabbing my sweater. "Awesome."

Because it was so nice out, we were taking Jake's bike. I loved riding on the bike with him. He finally let me start riding it this year. He would let me when he first got it four years ago. I climbed on after him and wrapped my arms around his waist, burying my helmeted head into his back.

We lived about ten minutes from the school, sometimes five, depending on the traffic and how fast Jake was going. He never went fast when I was on the bike with him though. He made sure to only go the speed limit.

He dropped me off, telling me that he would be back to pick me up after school, then drove off. I heaved my backpack up onto my back and went into school, dreading the six hours of sitting I would have to do.


	4. Peer Pressure

Chapter 4:

I was really glad that Jake made me get up early to do my homework this morning, because my teacher gave a DYRT quiz right before lunch about the short story we had to read. She even corrected them right away while we did some silent reading, and those who failed had to stay in for lunch and read it in lunch detention. I'd been to detention before, lunch, and after school. It wasn't fun either time, and Jake wasn't too happy to find out that I went there.

The ground outside was still a little soggy from the rain yesterday afternoon, but it wasn't so bad that we had to eat inside. I found a picnic table with my three friends, Abby, Kit, and Joey. Joey was a girl. Her full name was Joanne, but she hated it. So she told everyone to call her Joey. She was sort of a tom-boy too, always running off playing sports with the boys when she finished lunch and had some time before the period was over. She had short black hair, cut even with her chin, and bright brown eyes.

Abby was a real girly girl. She moved here from California with her parents for some job they had. She had long blond hair that she curled every night, the way they used to do with the rags rolled up in the hair. She tried to do it to my hair once, but my hair is so thick and straight that it didn't hold. Abby loved La Push. She said it was really different from California, but it had a certain je ne sais quoi, about it. She had to explain to me what that meant. It's french for "I don't't know what", basically. I think it's just because she thinks my brother is hot.

Kit was my best friend since elementary school. She's Quill's younger sister. She knows about the wolves, but her parents don't really like to expose her to it that much. I think they're afraid if they do, she might turn as well. They didn't mind Quill turning, but Kit is their baby girl.

"Quill told me that you spied on their meeting last night." Kit whispered to me when we sat down. I flushed immediately, cursing Quill and his big fat mouth.

"Yeah." I said sheepishly.

"So?" she pressed. "What happened?"

I shrugged. "Not much."

"Oh, come on! I bet Jake was furious!"

I shrugged again, picking at my peanut butter and jelly sandwich that Jake made for me that morning. He even cut the crust off for me. Even though I had known Kit forever, I still didn't feel comfortable discussing my personal life, such as what happens between Jake and I when I get in trouble, with her. It was embarrassing. I mean, there are probably other kids out there that still get spanked, even kids older than me, maybe. But who ever wants to tell someone else that they went over their older brothers knees and had their butts spanked until they were a crying, messy heap over his lap? No one, that's who.

"Yeah but he got over it. Just said he better not catch me doing something like that again." I took a bite of the sandwich. "Which believe me, I don't think I will."

I didn't even want to mention what I heard. That I might be the next one to turn. Maybe if I didn't talk about it, it wouldn't happen.

"Kia!"

I heard my name being called, and looked up to see Collin and Brady heading towards me. They were seniors in high school now. They changed when the Volturi came last time, and they were only thirteen.

"Oh no." I mumbled as they got closer. I eyed them suspiciously as they sat down at my table next to Joey and Abby. Abby stopped talking to Joey and looked at the two of them, sizing them up. "What do you want?" I asked, hoping they weren't here to bring up what happened last night.

"Don't sound to glum." Collin said, taking a bite of an apple he had. "We just wanted to let you know that Jake texted us and asked us to bring you home after school."

"Why?" I demanded, feeling a little irritated. He said he would pick me up.

"He has to run to the Cullen's after work and talk to them about some important stuff," he hinted. I huffed, putting my sandwich down on the picnic table. "Brady and I are gonna drive you back to Sam's house after school."

"Okay." I replied gloomily, putting my face in my palms.

"Why don't you come over to my house after school?" Abby asked me.

"I can't." I told her. "I'm having dinner at Sam's tonight. And I'd have to ask Jake first."

"Aww, come on." Abby gave me a pout. "You know we haven't hung out together in forever! When was the last time you came over to my house?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"Exactly!" she drawled. "So you should come over tonight. Joey's coming over. I'm sure Kit will come over too!"

"Yeah, totally." Kit said.

"I can't." I repeated. Maybe on a day I was feeling a bit braver, but I didn't want to do anything to upset Jake. "Maybe next week."

"We'll see you after school." Collin said as he and Brady stood up.

"Okay." I replied, then they walked back the way they came from.

"Come on," Joey said, leaning in over the table. "It's not like we're going to be doing drugs or anything! We're just going to Abby's house!"

I would never do drugs. Not only are they really bad for you, but all the health teachers at school say if you try them once, you'll never stop. They say you'll get addicted and end up living on the streets, or worse, in jail. Besides, if I ever even looked at a drug, Jake would kill me.

"I can't!" I said more firmly. "So stop asking, because I'm not doing it."

I stood up, grabbing all my lunch in a big fistful and tossed it into the trash can near by, making my way back to the cafeteria.

When school ended, I waited out front for Collin and Brady. I knew they would take a few minutes to get to me, because they got out when I did, and the parking lot where they parked their car was full of other students. I sat down on the grass and pulled some up, mindlessly. Why wasn't I allowed to go to the Cullen's while Jake was there? I wanted to know what was going on too. Besides, if I did end up changing, I didn't want to be left out.

"Kia!" I looked up to see Brady parked along the curb, Collin calling my name out the passenger window. I threw my handful of grass back onto the ground, grabbed my backpack and stood up, slinging it over my shoulder.

When I got into the car, Collin turned around and handed me his cell phone.

"Jake wants you to call him." He told me. I took the phone, flipping it open and dialing Jake's number. Because I didn't have my own cell phone, I had to remember Jake's number, along with practically everyone elses. I knew Sam's cell, his house number, Seth and Leah's cell, Edwards cell, Alice's cell, and the Cullen's house number.

"Hey." Jake answered.

"Hey, Jake." I said, cheering up a little at his voice. "Collin and Brady said that they're taking me cliff jumping!"

"What?" Jake demanded, as Collin turned around in his seat to look at me, then realized I was just joking, cracked a smile. "They're doing what?"

"Cliff jumping?" I replied. Jake was silent for a minute before he responded.

"You're funny. You almost had me there, for a second." I smiled.

"Why are you at the Cullen's?" I asked him curiously. "Why couldn't I come?"

"After last night? You already know more than you should." Jake told me, his voice a little more stern, but not quite. "Besides, I'm not going to be here long. We're just talking about some options, and then I'm coming back. Emily's making dinner tonight, remember?"

"Yeah."

"How'd school go?"

"Good."

"Do you have any homework?"

"I have a take home test for a book we finished today."

"Do you want me to help you with it tonight?" he offered. I smiled.

"Please?"

"Of course. Any other homework?"

"I have to think of what person I want to research for a paper we have to write. It's going to be one of those long papers where they make you research and write note cards on it, and they check every other day. Then you have to write like five pages on it."

"Oh." Jake said, and he knew exactly what I was talking about. "That's not going to be fun."

"I know."

"Well, start thinking a little bit while you're at Emily's. Maybe her and Sam will help you brainstorm a little."

"Okay."

"Alright. I'll see you in a little. Love ya, kid."

"Love you too, Jake." I said, then flipped the phone shut and handed it back to Collin.

"You guys are starting your papers too?" Brady asked. "We started ours last week. They're a real pain in the ass."

"Yeah. I haven't even read more than ten pages on my dude." Collin laughed.

"So what do you do when they check your note cards?" I asked.

"I just skim through the book and make some stuff up."

"Oh." I said, as we pulled into Emily's driveway. They stopped the car and I got out. "Are you coming for dinner tonight?"

"No, it's just the originals tonight."

That's what they called Sam, Jake, Quill, Embry, Seth, Leah, Jared, and Paul. They were the first eight to turn when the Cullen's had moved here. Then it was Collin and Brady, and a few others, Will, Skye, Patrick, Flint, and Mark.

"Oh, okay." I closed the door, and waved to them as they drove away.

I walked up to the house, then stopped before I walked in. Would Emily be mad at me for last night? Would she even want to talk to me? I started to feel nervous. I wasn't sure if I wanted to find out just yet.

"Kia?" Sam's voice appeared behind me, and I turned around to see him coming up the driveway. "What are you doing?"

"I'm-Jake told me to come here!" I said.

"Yeah, I know that. But how long have you been standing out here?"

"Not long." I replied. "I just got here."

Sam came up the steps, looking from me to the door, then back to me.

"So. . . what are you waiting for?" he asked, glancing around as if expecting some reason for me not to be inside just appear. I shrugged and he raised en eyebrow at me.

"You're not doing anything suspicious, are you?"

"No." I said, taken aback.

"Then why are you standing on my porch. You don't even knock when you come here." he crossed his arms at me.

"I was just. . . I didn't know. . . I'm afraid that Emily was going to be mad at me and not want to see me." I said, ending so fast that my words just tumbled out. Sam seemed to get the gist though, and nodded slowly.

"I see." he said. Then silence.

"Well? Is she?" I asked.

"Yes."

I sighed, slumping my shoulders.

"Don't worry. Emily isn't one to hold a grudge." Sam winked, then opened the door and motioned for me to go in. I slumped my shoulders, grabbing onto my backpack straps and headed into the house before him.

**Merry Christmas! Hope everyone enjoys this chapter, and the holiday as well! Comments are greatly appreciated ;) **


	5. Solutions

Chapter 5:

The house smelled amazing when I walked in, almost like Thanksgiving Day. I paused long enough to kick off my shoes-something the guys in the pack made fun of me for. I was the only one that ever took my shoes off in Emily's house. Everyone else just walked in and walked out with them on. I guess it was because they were so used to always going in and out when they had to talk to Sam, but I spent longer periods of time there.

I followed my nose into the kitchen where Emily was bending down into the oven, basting what looked like a giant turkey. I placed my backpack on the table and sat down unnoticed. That was, until Sam walked in.

"Hey, babe." he said, placing a gentle hand on her back and slowly moving it down to her butt. I scrunched my nose in disgust and looked away.

"Hey!" Emily replied brightly, "You're back earlier than I expected."

"There wasn't much to do, today."

I placed my head in my hands and glanced over at Emily and saw that she was embraced in Sam's arms, receiving light kisses on her nose.

"Dinner will be ready in one hour." she told him, and then finally, her gaze found me. I could see the look of surprise on her face when she saw me. She hadn't heard me come in. "Oh." she said, tilting her head to the side a little. "So now you're sneaking _into _houses?"

I opened my mouth to say something, then closed it. I didn't know what to say, and I was embarrassed. I was also slightly hurt. I knew I made a mistake, and I paid for it last night with Jake. I guess I didn't really expect to have to pay for it with Emily too. I slumped down into my chair, putting my head on my arm and picking at a loose thread on one of the place mats.

"Start your homework, Kiana." Emily said, turning away from me and going to the stove where water was boiling. I glanced over at Sam who nodded, encouraging me to listen to her.

I straightened up and opened my backpack. Taking out my folders and books. I let Emily cook while I did my take home test. Sam disappeared and didn't show up again until dinner time when I put my homework away and the boys (and Leah) started to show up. I set the dining room table and began carrying out the dishes, placing them where ever I could find room. Emily make turkey with mashed potatoes, corn, gravy, cranberry sauce, stuffing, rolls, candied carrots, and a green bean casserole. I swear, I don't think I know anyone who could make such a meal for so many people by themselves, except for Emily, and it always came out perfect.

I was putting the rolls on the table when Jake came into the dining room. I had been bummed ever since Emily first spoke to me, and she hadn't really said anything else after telling me to do my homework, so I was really happy to see Jake. I immediately went over to him and threw my arms around his waist. He hugged me back and kissed the top of my head.

"She hates me, Jake." I whispered into him. He leaned down a little, saying 'what'. "Emily hates me now." I whispered, afraid to say it too loud so she could hear me. Jake pulled back and drew his eye brows together.

"What are you talking about, Kia?"

"Emily. She-"

"Yeah, I heard you. But you're not making any sense."

It was my turn to draw my brows together and look at him frustratedly. How was I not making any sense?

"Emily loves you. She could never hate you." Jake explained. "You just disappointed her. You have to understand, she trusted you and you broke that trust."

"But I said I was sorry!" I whined.

"Did you?" Jake asked, and I paused. Well, I hadn't said it Emily yet, had I? I was little too afraid to say it earlier. Jake seemed to read my mind, like always. "After dinner you should talk to her."

"Will you do it with me?" I asked.

"No, this is something between you and Emily. It would be unfair of me to impose on it."

I didn't say anything. Jake reached out and ruffled my hair, flashing me a smile.

"Come on, show me a smile."

I lifted one corner of my mouth in an attempt to smile. I didn't really feel like smiling.

"What is that?" Jake said in mock disgust. "That's like, I don't even know what to call that!"

"What?" Leah came into the room, tying her hair up in to a bun at the back of her head.

"That thing she calls a smile." Jake said, gesturing to my face. I immediately stopped as Leah looked over.

"She's not even smiling." Leah pointed out, raising an eyebrow at Jake.

"So you see my problem." Jake countered. Leah inhaled a deep breath, then said,

"Yeah, the problem is you're crazy."

That made me crack a smile. Leah wasn't afraid to speak her mind, not even to Jake.

"What-Oh I see. Now you smile." Jake threw his hands up in defeat. "You just can't give your poor old brother a break, can you?"

I shook my head and giggled. Jake raised an eyebrow at me.

"Oh really?" he stepped towards me, a mischievous glimmer in his eyes. I knew exactly what was going to happen next. I pivoted on my heals, attempting to run the other way, but he was way too fast. Scary fast. He had me around the waist and on the floor in a second, tickling my sides.

"Noo!" I screamed, laughing. The doorway became crowded suddenly as the boys came to see what was going on. "Help!" I pleaded, trying to pushing Jake's fingers off my sides. He was too strong though, and I couldn't sway them. "Help!"

"No way!" Jared said. "I'm not getting in a tickle war. Especially with another guy."

They all stepped around us and sat down at the table as Jake continued to tickle me. I screeched, writhing, trying to escape it.

"I'm. . . gonna. . . die!" I panted. Jake was brutal. He would tickle until you thought you were going to die. "Jake, please!"

"Will you two knock it off?" a voice said, and Jake immediately stopped. Emily was standing over him, another gravy boat in her hands. "Thank you. Now if you don't mind, the rest of us are ready to start dinner." she hinted.

Jake smiled at her in his charming way, and pulled me off the floor. I averted my eyes. It wasn't like I needed another reason for Emily to be mad at me. I took my seat at the table next to Jake. He squeezed my shoulder in a comforting way before beginning to load his plate and mine with food.

"So, Jake" Paul said after a while of silence. "Got any news on what's going on?"

Jake glanced at Paul, then back at me. "Yeah, we're going to talk about it after dinner." he said. I tried not to scowl. I knew what was going on and he still wouldn't say anything in front of me.

"Actually," Jake continued, "Nessie is coming over after dinner so we can all discuss the plan."

If I wasn't scowling before, I certainly was now. That was just great. Jake said he would help me with my homework after dinner, but now there's a meeting going on, and on top of that, Nessie is coming over.

I stabbed a piece of turkey a little harder than I meant to, and soon the entire table was looking at me. I looked back at them and shrugged, quickly coming up with an excuse.

"Stupid turkey keeps falling off my fork." I grumbled, shoving it in my mouth before looking back down at my plate.

"Alice is coming as well." Jake said this with a little bitterness in his voice. Since Nessie turned seventeen a few months ago, and her and Jake started to become more romantically involved, Edward and Bella never let her come over alone. Most of the time they hung out at the Cullen's, or went out and did something, but the past few months Bella has made it clear she doesn't want Nessie over here alone without any of them.

Jake hated it. He didn't like being chaperoned as he was twenty one years old. I didn't mind it, honestly. Nessie rarely ever comes to our house anymore, but when she does, one of her aunts or uncles comes with her, which gives me someone to hang out with. Usually it's Alice, or Emmett. Rosalie was band from coming by Nessie, when she wouldn't leave her side and kept giving Jake looks like she wanted to kill him.

"Dude, when are they going to stop sending baby-sitters over?" Seth asked as he shoved a spoonful of mashed potatoes into his mouth, earning a reproving look from Emily.

"Maybe you guys should just do it and get it over with." Paul smirked.

"Hey! Watch your mouth." Jake snapped, glancing over at me. I pretended like I didn't hear them, while inside, I was mentally puking. The thought of Jake and Nessie doing anything like . . . that, was just disgusting. Honestly, even watching the two of them kiss was pretty gross too.

"Can we talk about something nice, please?" Emily spoke up. "Let's not ruin this dinner with vulgar conversation."

"I'm not sure these boys are capable of anything other than vulgar." Leah quipped.

"Yeah, look at the way they eat." I pointed out. Half the boys paused to look at me, mouths stuffed full with innocent looks in their eyes. "Point made."

"With cooking like this, how can you not stuff your face?" Embry said, grinning. He had a piece of corn stuck in his teeth, but I didn't say anything. I shook my head and looked back down at my plate which was half empty already. Some of the boys were already starting to get second helpings.

"So why don't you guys tell me about your day?" Emily said after a moment of silence. "Anything interesting happen?"

"Not really." Quill shrugged as Jared shook his head.

"My boss quit today." Embry threw out. "Other than that, no, not really."

"I got a test back that I took a week ago. I got a B plus on it."

"What subject?" Jake asked, and I told him English. "Good job."

"Thanks."

"What about you?" Sam asked Emily. "How was your day?"

"It was good. I cooked."

"You did a great job."

"Yeah," everyone chorused.

Dinner lasted about another fifteen minutes. It got quiet for a while as everyone ate, and then talk picked up as people finished. I didn't say much. I sat there pushing food around my plate once I was too full to eat it anymore.

Jake turned to me and leaned in closer to say, "I didn't forget what I said."

I looked at him questioningly.

"I'm still going to help you with your homework tonight. The meeting shouldn't be more than an hour, okay?"

"Okay." I shrugged, looking back at my plate.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." I said, trying to sound convincing.

"You know, you're a terrible liar sometimes." Jake pointed out. He was right though. Sometimes I couldn't tell a lie to save my life.

"I'm just tired." That wasn't a lie, but it wasn't really what was bothering me. But how could I tell him that I was mad because the girl he loved was coming over and I hated her? It was probably the most impractical thing I could do.

Jake reached out and stroked my hair. "I know. Good thing you have an early bedtime tonight. That should help you catch back up on some sleep." There was a subtle hint in his voice almost like he was finding it amusing that I had an early bedtime.

"Oh, right." I scooped some mashed potatoes onto my fork and put it into my mouth, just as there was a knock at the front door, before it opened and Nessie and Alice walked in.

"Hey," she smiled at Jake in such a sickeningly sweet way. I rolled my eyes and plopped my face into my hand. Leah was watching me from across the table and when I caught her gaze, she winked at me. I got worried for a second when I realized she had seen me do that, but then relaxed when she winked. Leah pretty much felt the same way.

"Hey." Jake said, standing up. "You guys ready?"

There was a chorus of "yes's" that came from the table as everyone stood up. I remained sitting, knowing that I wasn't invited to this meeting. They all filed out of the dining room and outside, leaving me and Emily sitting at the table.

I glanced over at her.

"Help me clear the table?" She asked, standing up and grabbing the plates closest to her. I nodded, standing up and piling the plates around me on top of each other to bring them into the kitchen.

We worked in silence for the first few moments, as I tried to think of what to say. I was going to do what Jake suggested and apologize, but I didn't know quite how to do it. So finally, I just said,

"Emily, I'm really sorry I broke your trust in me and snuck out of the house last night. It was stupid and dangerous and I'm really sorry."

I stood where I was after placing the dishes on the counter. Emily turned around leaning against the sink to look at me as I said it.

"And I don't want you to hate me." I added, tears springing into my eyes, even though I tried very hard to fight them back. This seemed to break her shell, because she let out a small sigh and came forward, pulling me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around her, the tears in my eyes trickling gently down my face into her shirt.

"I don't hate you, Kia." She told me. "I could never hate you. Yes, I am disappointed in you for the decisions you made. They were very foolish. But the worst part is that when Sam came to tell me what happened, the first thing I felt was fear. Fear that something could have happened to you, and fear that it could have been my fault."

"But it wasn't! I made the decision. It wouldn't have been your fault!" I told her, feeling guilty.

"But I was the one watching you. Me, the adult. If something ever happened to you on my watch, I would never be able to forgive myself."

"I'm sorry!" I sobbed, feeling even worse than before. "I promise I'm never going to do it again!"

"I should hope not."

"Do you forgive me?"

"Yes, I forgive you. You know I could never stay mad at you." She kissed the top of my head, then pulled back. "Now let's finish clearing that table. You can help me wash the dishes too."

I wiped the tears from my face and nodded, going back into the dining room to grab more dishes. Most of them were clean from the boys eating, but there was some food left over.

"I have to write about a historical person for an essay at school." I said as we stood at the sink washing dishes. Emily was scrubbing them and I was drying them. They had a dishwasher, but it broke a week ago and Sam hadn't gotten around to fixing it.

"Oh? What kind of historical person?"

"I don't know. Some famous person like Martin Luther King Jr. or Susan B. Anthony. Someone like that." I shrugged.

"Mhm. Do you have anyone in mind yet?"

"No. Jake said he would help me after the meeting tonight."

"Well, you should pick someone who did something that's interesting to you. For example, I would pick Rosa Parks. She stood up for herself doing something she believed in. That is an interest to me."

I nodded, thinking. What was I interested in? Honestly, my life had been so sheltered in La Push, that I didn't know much else about the world. So, what other people did, didn't really make a difference to me.

"Well, there's Harriet Tubman." I said after a while.

"What about her?" Emily pushed.

"She led a bunch of people to freedom even though she was putting her life in danger doing it. She was protecting her people. Kind of like Jake."

Emily laughed.

"Well, it's not totally like Jake." I defended, feeling stupid for saying it.

"No, I'm sorry. That's a great start. If you can make a personal connection with someone, that makes it even better. I think Harriet Tubman is a great choice. There's plenty of books out there about her and you'll have no trouble finding information about her."

"You think so?" I asked perking up. I bet Jake would be impressed when we got home and I told him I already had someone picked out.

"Yeah. I think you should go for it."

I smiled as the door opened and the guys walked in.

"Good night!" some called as they gathered their things and left, while the others made their way into the living room. Jake came in last with Nessie at his side and Alice behind. She came right over to me and winked.

"You're gonna do great." she told me, a conspiratorial tone, before skipping over and slipping her arm into Nessie's. "It's time for us to leave, now." She told her.

"Alright." Nessie sighed, turning to Jake. She leaned up on her tip toes and kissed him on the lips. I resisted to urge to gag and walked to the door, not caring to witness their goodbye.

"Bye." she said when they walked past me out of the house. I waved not saying anything, then felt Jake come up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders.

"Ready?" he asked. I turned around and wrapped my arms around him, nodding. "Alright, let's go."


	6. Waiting

Chapter 6:

Some time between this morning and when Jake showed up to Sam's, he switched his bike out for his car. I climbed into the front seat, tossing my backpack on the floor between my feet. I rested my head against the seat and yawned as Jake opened his door and slid in. Our house wasn't too far down the road, and Jake and I didn't talk much. I was too tired to really say anything, and Jake had that look on his face as though he had a lot on his mind.

When we got home, I went inside and put my backpack away, then put on my pajamas. They were flannel, and purple. I loved purple, it was my favorite color. The Cullen's gave them to me for my birthday a few months ago. More specifically, Alice, because she new I would like them. That was one of the weird things. Alice couldn't see Jake or any of the wolves in her visions, but because I wasn't technically a wolf, she could still see me.

I went back into the living room to find Jake sitting on the couch with the TV on.

"Ready to do some brainstorming?" he asked. I shook my head, sitting down next to him. "No? Why not?"

"Because, Emily already helped me. I chose who I'm going to write about."

"Oh, really?" He asked, giving me an impressed look. "Who?"

"I'm not saying. But I'll let you read it when I'm done."

"You're going to make me wait until you're done writing it?" he asked, as if it were the worst thing I could possibly do to him. I nodded, smiling. "How can I help you then?"

"I'm sure Emily will help me! After all, she is the one that helped me come up with it."

"Oh, right." Jake said, rolling his eyes with a smile on his face. "Well, since you're done, do you want to watch a little TV before bed?"

"Can I pick?"

"Sure." Jake handed me the remote and I brought up the TV guide, looking through until I found a show that I wanted to watch. I snuggled up into his side and pulled a blanket over me. Jake draped his arm around my shoulder and kissed the top of my head.

Kit thinks it's strange that Jake and I have such a close relationship. She isn't really close with her brother, and the two of them snuggling is something unheard of around their house. I can't imagine life any other way with Jake though. It would be weird if we were anything but close. We always had been, and always will. I was going to make sure of that. I wasn't going to let anything-or anyone-stand in the way. Especially not some half-breed vampire.

"Hey," Jake shook me, and I hadn't realized that I dozed off. "Bed time." he said gently. I groaned, snuggling closer to him and closing my eyes again. I could feel the movement of him chuckling, then his arms had wrapped around me and picked me up. I wrapped my arms around his neck and smiled.

"I love you, Jake." I said as he carried me into my room, then placed me in my bed.

"I love you too." He said, pulling my blankets out from under me, then covering me with them. "We're getting up early to go to the Cullen's tomorrow morning. The Volturi are supposed to show up around the evening at some point."

"What are we going to do there?" I asked. Hang out with Nessie? Ugh.

"I'm going to do some more talking with them, and you are going to mind your own business in a different room."

I crinkled my nose at him.

"Hey Jake, can we do something Sunday?"

"Like what?" he asked, resting his head on his elbow on my bed.

"I don't know. Something that's just you and me." I glanced down at my bed and picked at a thread unraveling from my sheets. Jake smacked my hand away from it telling me I would ruin it. "We just haven't done anything by ourselves in a while, and I miss you."

Jake smiled at me.

"We can do whatever you want on Sunday."

I smiled back, content and finally ready to sleep.

"I'll come wake you up in the morning, okay?" I nodded, and hugged him goodnight. He turned my light off then closed the door behind him as he left.

I fell into a restless sleep, dreaming of wolves and vampires with glowing red eyes.

When Jake finally woke me up the next morning, I went into the bathroom to shower, and saw that I had dark bags under my eyes. I glowered at my reflection, looking closer into the mirror. Not only were the bags under my skin ugly, but the rest of my face was too. My eyes were so plain looking, unlike those girls in the movies. You always wanted to look at their eyes. Mine, you could hardly notice, and my lips . . . They were so thick it made me look like a fish.

I sighed, pulling away from the mirror. I really needed make up. Then I could be pretty like all those other girls. There was no way that Jake would let me get make up though. I could always hear him telling Nessie she shouldn't wear make up and that she looked pretty without it. Well, she's a vampire, so what does he expect? They're all beautiful. Even the ugly ones are beautiful.

If I asked Alice or anyone else to bring me, they'd make sure it was okay with Jake first. I dropped my towel from my body, getting ready to get dressed. Nessie used to look like me, too. All straight, with no curves or boobs. But now she's curvy with boobs. But even when she looked like me, she was cute. I'm just awkward. I look like an over sized five year old.

"Kia, let's go! What's taking you so long, did you fall in?" Jake called from outside the door. I jumped, covering myself with my hands, worried he might walk in. I don't know why I worried, he never did.

"Uh j-just a second. I have to get dressed!" I called, trying not to sound guilty. I listened for his footsteps going away, then gave myself one more look over in the mirror. It didn't make me feel any better than the first time I looked.

With a sigh, I got dressed and left the bathroom. Jake was waiting for me in the kitchen, finishing off a glass of water.

"What wrong, kiddo?" he asked as I walked in.

"Nothing."

"Alright." He said after regarding me carefully for a moment. "Let's go."

When we got to the Cullen's, Jake set me up in the living room with the Xbox. They had a lot of games, because they had a lot of time to play them. I played a few different games by the time they all emerged from Carlisle's study. Everyone except Jake and Nessie, that is.

"Where's Jake?" I asked Jasper as he came over and sat next to me, Emmett on the other side.

"He went for a walk with Ness." he said. "Do you mind if we play a few games with you?"

I shook my head. I guess I had some time to kill now.

~.~

When Jake came back, he called for me to get ready to go. The Cullen's and their guests were preparing for the Volturi to arrive, and Jake and I had to go back so he could get the pack together to do whatever it was they were going to do. I was going to be dropped off at Emily's.

I was going to be dropped off at Emily's to sit and wait, and wondering . . . who was going to be the next to change.

**Hey everyone! Just wanted to say thank you for all the reviews, I really appreciate them. I also wanted to let you know I updated my profile page so if anyone wants to go take a peek at that, be my guest :) **

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I hope to have another out soon!  
**

**GEW**


	7. Is This What Puberty Is Like?

Chapter 7:

Emily was crocheting when I walked into the house. She was sitting in the living room with the TV on, but the volume was down low. I took my shoes off at the door and went over to the couch, sitting next to her.

"Hey, you." she said, giving me a smile.

"Hey, Emily." I sighed.

"Did the Pack leave?"

I nodded, sitting back into the couch. My head had started to hurt on the car ride over and I wasn't feeling to good.

"Emily, can we go to the beach?" I asked hopefully. I didn't want to be stuck inside all day waiting. I wanted to get out and do something to get my mind off what I was missing, and what might happen.

"We sure can. When do you want to go?"

"Can we go now?"

"Sure! Let's pack up some lunches and towels." She placed her crocheting stuff down on the coffee table, then turned to TV off before standing up. I heaved myself to my feet and followed her into the kitchen to help make sandwiches and put some snack into little bags for us. While she finished putting the food in the cooler, I retrieved some towels from the closet in the hallway, a pack of cards from the living room, and the magazines that were on the coffee table. I put them all in a bag then went back into the kitchen.

Emily was zipping the cooler shut.

"Do you want to stop at your house for a bathing suit?" she asked me. To get to the beach, we had to go by my house.

"Are you going to swim?" I asked, and she nodded. "Yeah, I'll get it."

I didn't want to be the only one swimming. The water was relatively warm at this time of the year. It was only mid September, so it wasn't that warm, but it wasn't bad. Besides, we grew up with it, so we were used to pretty much whatever temperature it got to.

I went with Emily to her car and put the bag of towels and stuff into the backseat, then slid into the front.

The sun was peeking out from behind the clouds today. It was nice and felt good on my skin. It wasn't often that there were days like this. I laid my towel out on the ground and laid stomach down on it, taking out some of the magazines I took from the coffee table. They were the magazines that said things on the front like "Classic looks for fall", and "Hair styles that are right for you".

"I didn't know you were into fashion." Emily said as I began flipping through the first one. I glanced up and shrugged. Maybe by looking through these I could find some ideas on how to make myself look like the models. Or at least resemble something other than an awkward, plain-jane girl.

Emily laid down, putting her sunglasses on. Most of us that lived in La Push were pretty tan, but soaking up the sun felt incredible, no matter what skin color you were.

I didn't find much in the magazine that interested me. Though I did find an article titled, "65 Great Sex Moves He'll Love in Bed". I flipped past that faster than I could read the title when I realized what it was. I could feel a blush forming in my face. Did women really read this kind of stuff? Did _Emily _read it? I closed the magazine and tossed it back into the bag, totally disgusted and having gross thoughts about Emily and why she would even need to read that.

I laid on my towel for a moment, then slowly started to feel hotter and hotter. A sweat was building up on my skin after a few moments. I sat up, wiping my brow with the back of my hand.

"It's so hot out!" I said. "Want to go in the water?"

Emily turned her head to look at me.

"I'm going to wait a little bit. You can go, I'll watch you."

I stood up, taking my shorts and tee shirt off. I was wearing a tankini. I told Jake over the summer I needed a new bathing suit, and he came home one night with a one piece. I tried to like it and appreciate that he went out and bought one for me, but by the end of the night I was crying and telling him that I couldn't be caught dead wearing a one piece anymore. I was in middle school now, it wasn't cool to wear one pieces. I had to have a two piece.

Jake didn't want to get me a two piece at first. He said I was too young to be wearing bikini's. I was so upset that I called Alice and told her, hoping she-the most fashion forward one of us all-would be able to convince him to get me a two pieces. When I called her, she suggested a tankini. I had never heard of one before then, and I told Jake about it. Jake seemed to think that a tankini was more acceptable for me than a bikini, so the next day he brought me to the store to return the one he bought, and let me pick my own out.

When the water swelled up over my feet the first time, it cooled my skin. I walked in until I was up to my waist. Sometime the water was rough and wavy, but today it was relatively calm. I bent my knees until I was down to my neck.

At first, the water felt great. It had cooled me down, but then, I still felt like I was really hot. I swam a little ways to the right, then back to the left, trying to get the water moving around me.

It wasn't working as well as I had hoped. That was weird for it to be so hot in the middle of September. I waded my way back out of the water and headed back towards Emily. I had only made it halfway to her when all the sudden my head seemed to explode.

I yelled in pain, grabbing my head and sinking to my knees in the pebbly sand. My head felt as though someone were trying to rip it open from the inside out, and my skin felt like it was on fire.

"No!" I screamed, bending into the fetal position. I could hear Emily calling my name, and the sound of her running over to me. "Go away!" I snapped at her, lashing out with my hand.

"Kia, relax. You're going to be okay. Just breathe." she tried soothing. That fed into my rage that had suddenly appeared out of no where. I couldn't tell if I was wet from swimming anymore, or if I was just sweating that much.

I pushed myself to my feet, holding my arms out to steady myself, I headed towards the woods.

"Kia," Emily started, reaching out to grab me, but before she could, I took off, running. I forced myself to stay on my feet, to run as deep into the woods as I could. I wanted to get away from Emily. I didn't want to be around anyone. I didn't even want to be around myself.

Emily had disappeared behind me, and I couldn't even see the beach anymore. I dropped to the ground, unable to run anymore.

"Ahhh," I screamed, heaving myself onto my feet. I was terrified. I knew what was happening now. But through all the pain I was in, and the unexplained anger I had, the fear was further back in my mind. Slowly though, it was creeping it's way forward. "No!" I wailed, grabbing my head once again. "No, not now!"

I took more steps into the woods.

"Jake!" I yelled as loud as I could. "Jake, help! I need you!"

I finally collapsed to my knees again, my entire body shaking. I couldn't control it now, and soon, my bones were vibrating.

"No, no, n-" my entire body erupted out of its skin, hair popping out, bones changing. I laid there on the ground, whimpering. Where was Jake when I needed him? I thought. He said he would protect me. But he wasn't here, and here I was, alone, scared, and a wolf.

I suddenly remembered that as a wolf, my mind was connected to the rest of the packs. I pushed myself to my feet-or, paws. It was a strange feeling, being on all fours. I tried walking forward, and felt unsteady.

_Jake! Jake can you hear me? _I called mentally. I waited, but heard nothing. That was weird. The Pack could hear each other from a good distance away, and they weren't that far. Maybe they weren't in their wolf form. Maybe everything was over, and they were all talking to the Cullen's and being happy that everything worked out. If it even worked out. Which I wished it didn't.

I growled, then stopped. I hadn't intentionally meant to growl. It just sort of came out. But I was mad. I wasn't scared anymore, I was angry. I was angry because this all happened, because of stupid Nessie. Stupid Nessie and her stupid imprint with my stupid brother.

Anger flooded through me like a wildfire. She did this to me, and I was going to make her pay.

Without so much as a backwards glance, I took off. I knew where they were, because the Cullen's always had meetings in a certain field. That meant that they would be there, and so would Nessie. It was a little awkward running, I had a hard time controlling myself. But the longer I ran, the easier it became.

It was only a few minutes, when I got close to the field. I made my way to the edge, looking out. The Volturi were still there, and boy did they give me shivers. They looked however, to be getting ready to leave. Nessie was shaking hands with one of them, who bowed his head to her, then stepped back.

"Someday, I will have one of you." Aro said, looking around at them. "My dear, Alice, I do hope it shall be you."

"We will see." Alice replied, her voice slightly frigid.

"You might want to think about moving soon, Carlisle." a blond one said. "You have been here quite long. People will start to wonder. . ." he trailed off.

"Plans are already being discussed." Carlisle responded.

I crept forward more, crouching low to the ground, watching as the Volturi turned and left. They were there one moment, and the next, they were practically gone. That was my moment. That was my opportunity. I lunged out of the woods, running across the field towards them. They all turned and looked in surprise. They obviously didn't recognize me as a wolf they had seen before.

I made my way directly toward Nessie. I was going to kick her butt. I was going to make her understand just how much I hated her, and how all of this was her fault.

Edward moved from one spot, to in front of Nessie instantly. So did the rest of her family. I growled, snapping my teeth as I ran.

Suddenly, there was a voice in my head.

_Kiana, stop! _

It was Jake's voice. I stopped dead in my tracks, turning, looking around for him.

_Jake? Where are you? _I asked. He appeared out of the woods a moment later as himself, running. I ran towards him, everything in my head about Nessie forgotten. All I wanted was to get to Jake, to have him comfort me and hold me, like he said he would do. The anger subsided within me, and now, I was just a scared girl again.

When I reached him, I was about the same height as him. I stared at him, thinking that there was no way I could talk to him as a wolf.

Before I knew what happened, I had shrunk, and all the hair was gone. I was shorter than him, and to my complete humiliation-naked.

Jake ripped his shirt off and slipped it right over my head faster than I could even think to cover myself. His shirt went down mid-thigh on me.

"Jake." I whispered, throwing my arms around him, burying my face into his shoulder. I started crying.

"Shh, it's okay." he said, lifting me into his arms. He placed his arms under my butt, holding the shirt in place so it wouldn't slide up.

"No it's not! Nothing is okay! Not anymore!" I lifted my head and looked at him accusingly. "You said you would be there for me! You weren't there! I was all alone!"

"I'm sorry, baby." Jake said, placing his hand on the back of my head and guiding it down again. "I'm sorry I wasn't there. I didn't know it would happen. Just relax, okay? You're going to be okay."

I wiggled my way out of his arms, and glared at him.

"No it's not!" I insisted. "My entire life is ruined! And it's all her fault!" I pointed towards Nessie, yelling. "I hate her! I hate her more than I've ever hated anyone! She's the worst thing that's ever happened to me and I wish the Volturi would have taken her!"

Nessie's eyes widened, and Jake looked at me, speechless. He was so shocked by my outburst, he didn't know what to say. I was seething, my chest rising up and down as tears streamed down my face.

"I can't believe," Jake started, "How incredibly selfish you are being."

I looked up at him, confused.

"It is not Nessie's fault that you turned into a wolf. If anything, it's our fathers! Our genes! Nessie had nothing to do with it, how could you even say that!"

"Because it's true!" I yelled, stomping my foot. "And she's going to take you away from me!"

With that, I turned on my heels and ran back to the woods, holding Jake's shirt down with my hands.

"Where are you going?" Jake called after me.

"Leave me alone!" I yelled back.

"If you take one step into those woods, I am going to come after you, and if I have to come after you, I can promise you will not like it!"

**So, my much appreciated reviewers. What would you like to see? Would you like her to stop, or take that one, teeny-tiny step into the woods? Let me know!**

**Oh, and I have a poll on my page, for those of you interested in Supernatural fanfics. It's about one that I might write.  
**

**GEW  
**


	8. Desperate

_You feel so small and lost_  
_ Like you're the only one._  
_ You wanna scream,_  
_ 'Cause you're desperate._

Chapter 8:

I stopped running at the edge of the woods, turning around slowly to look at Jake. He was standing there with his arms at his side, one leg half a step forward. His eyes had that look in them, the one that said, you better do what I say. Even though Jake was the Alpha wolf, he never, if not rarely, actually ordered the Pack around. He liked being able to give them the choice of free will. But if the went against his order and did what he told them not to, or what he didn't want them to do, he had consequences for it, like physical training that would make military boot camp look like a piece of cake. One time he actually took away Seth's right to go to meetings for a month.

There were tears falling from my eyes like a waterfall, and my breath was catching in my throat as I looked at him.

"You're breaking my heart, Jake!" I yelled to him, my voice cracking. "You tell me you'll be there for me, but instead, you're there for _her!_" I wiped the back of my arm across my face, trying to clear my vision. "I can't take it anymore! I can't sit back and pretend that I'm okay with this anymore!"

Everyone just stood there, staring at me. A few members of the Pack edged their way out of the woods a few steps to get a good look at what was going on. They were in their human forms.

The vampires were standing, circled around Nessie, watching me. I could feel Jasper trying to calm me, but I was far enough away where it was weak. I looked from them, back to Jake.

"I'm not okay." I repeated, then abruptly turned around and ran into the woods. Jake called my name, but I ignored him. I couldn't remember a time when I didn't want to see Jake. Right now was one of those times. Just the picture of him in my mind made me angry.

Instead of heading home, back the way I came, I turned and headed a different direction, towards the mountains. I wanted to go somewhere that I could be by myself for a while. So much had just happened to me, and the one person that I thought would have made it better, let me down. I never thought Jake would do something like that. I guess when you imprint on someone, they become more important than family-more important than the person who _has been_ the most important to him.

I ran as fast as I could. Growing up in La Push, I was pretty familiar with woods. Jake and I played in the woods behind our house all the time as kids. He used to play a game with me where I would have to hide, and see how long I could stay hidden, all the while moving through the woods. I knew a little bit about tracking, and how to leave a minimal trail behind you.

Jake kicked himself in the butt for that later though, when I was able to hide without being caught for at least a good hour. But that was before he was a wolf and had wolf senses. That was when he was a normal boy. I was still young at that point. I was only about seven years old.

It didn't last that long either. The better I became at it, and the longer it took him to find me, the more weary my dad got about letting us play. He was worried that one of the days, Jake wouldn't be able to find me. We almost had a close call, because I went off once, exploring more of the woods. I tended to stay in the same area, but one day I got curious, knowing that Jake was somewhere behind me, I made my way north more, traveling to the mountains. Jake didn't quite expect me to go that far, and that confused him while following me. That day, it took him almost two hours to find me. We didn't tell our dad about that, but Jake scolded me and said I should never leave our woods.

I reached back into my memory of then and tried to recall all that I had learned by playing that game with Jake. I brought back the skills of being undetectable and used them to the best of my abilities, running, leaping, and darting through the woods.

I ran like my life depended on it, pushing myself. I didn't have anything to prove to anyone, but my anger and resentment towards Jake fueled my fire. I knew though, that if Jake asked the Cullen's to help him find me, I wouldn't make it very far. They were extremely fast. I was surprised I made it as far as I did. But I had to try. I just needed time to myself, and had I listened to Jake, I wouldn't be able to be by myself. In fact, I would probably have been answering to my attack on Nessie, and "wild" accusations towards her.

After about ten minutes of me running through the woods though, I heard a long howl, accompanied by several others. It was the Pack, and they were all in their wolf form. I assumed now, that Jake was creating a search party for me. He must have realized somehow that I wasn't heading home.

I shifted the direction I was running and headed towards the stream that crossed right under one of the mountains. I reached it in a few minutes, and ran in, swimming as I entered the middle. The current washed me down a few dozen yards, and I came out on the other side, heading into the trees at the base of the mountain. This mountain had large rocks and boulders strewn throughout it. Trees were fallen over and old logs were hollowed out.

I ran until I found a rock that had a space in between that I was small enough to slide into. It was the perfect spot, because it was two rocks, one leaning against the other, which formed a alcove underneath it.

I slid in, being forced to lay down because it wasn't that big. I curled up onto my side, and finally took the time to cry.

I cried for the fear I had at what was to come with responsibilities as a wolf now. Would I have to start patrolling like everyone else? Would I never be able to keep secrets from anyone in the pack again? They all saw me naked already, that was embarrassing enough. But for them to know everything I was thinking? My thoughts will never be safe again.

When I was done crying for that, I cried for the loneliness I felt in my heart. For the disappointment and let down that Jake had given me. Nothing would fix the problem between us. Nessie is supposed to live forever, and Jake is imprinted on her. There is no way for that to go away, not even if he wanted it to. Maybe I would just leave, move away and find someone else to love me. Maybe I could go out and find my imprint, and leave Jake here with his oh-so-important girl friend.

I heard a few more howl's, some far away, some relatively close.

I curled in closer to myself, realizing at that point, I should have been cold because I was wet and under a rock, but I wasn't. In fact, I was quite comfortable.

I wiped at my eyes with my hands and sniffed. Though I was warm, my nose was running like crazy from all the crying I had been doing.

I wondered how long it would take for someone to find me. Part of me didn't really want to know. Part of me didn't want to be found. I just wanted to lay there under my rock and cry for the rest of eternity. A girl can only take so much heart break in one year. I lost my father, I lost my brother, and I lost any chance at having a normal life.

A little bit later, I heard footsteps. I tensed up, peering out of my alcove, heart pumping. I was almost sure that if they couldn't find me through tracks, then they could find me through the loudness of my heart. I felt as though it were about to explode out of my chest. The footsteps stopped for a moment, then turned back and disappeared.

I let out a sigh of relief and rested my head back on the ground. Suddenly, I lifted it back up, realizing something. Those footsteps didn't sound four paws, it sounded like two feet. That meant, it had to have been one of the Cullen's. If it was one of the Cullen's, then they had to have heard my heart beat. If it was one of the Cullen's, they would have just came over and pulled me out from under the rock, they would have left to go get my brother, or even one of the Pack members. Which meant, my hiding spot was compromised.

I quickly army crawled out of my little hidey-hole, peering around the woods to make sure the coast was clear. There was no one in sight, so I inched myself the rest of the way out, then pushed myself to my feet, adjusting my shirt and holding it down, getting ready to run.

I took another peek around, then turned, making to head up further into the mountain. I started running, then stopped, as a giant black wolf leaped out of no where, snarling and snapping his teeth at me. I jumped and was so startled that a little yelp escaped my lips. It was Sam, and he was advancing on me, pushing me down the mountain.

I looked around me, trying to find a place to escape. No matter where I went, Sam would be able to get around in front. He was much faster than me as a human, and especially as a wolf.

"Sam, stop!" I said, trying to keep my voice from shaking. "Leave me alone, this has nothing to do with you!" He shook his head, continuing to advance. "I just want to be alone!" I yelled at him, desperate. "Can't you just leave me alone?"

I backed up into something solid. And warm. Something that put it's hands on my shoulders. I froze, eyes wide as I stared ahead of me, terrified at what was behind.

Sam came to a stop a few feet away from me, standing and watching. Guarding. Like I was a criminal that needed to be watched.

The hands moved, so that they were turning me around. I fought against them for a moment, but they were too strong, and soon, I was face to face with Jake.

Tears formed in my eyes as I looked into his extremely pissed off face.

"We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way, so what it's gonna be? Are you going to come home with me or am I going to have to drag you there?"

Knowing that Sam was in his wolf form, and watching this play out, everyone else in their wolf form had access to what was going on. I didn't want to risk the chance of giving Jake cause to spank me right then and there, because then everyone would know. I looked down at the ground, tears dripping down my face.

"If you're going to be mean to me, then I don't want to go with you." I sniffled, my voice wavering. I meant it too. If Jake was going to be mean and yell at me, I didn't want to go home with him. "I'll go with Sam."

Jake looked at me, baffled as I turned around and ran over to Sam, throwing my arms around him. I cried into his neck, comforted by the bigness of him, and softness of his hair. I couldn't help myself. I thought I had been all cried out under the rock, but it turned out I had some in reserve that I didn't know about.

"Kiana," Jake said, stepping forward. "We have things to talk about. A lot of things."

"I don't want to talk to you right now, Jake!" I wailed, clutching harder to Sam, begging him with my mind to let me go with him, though I knew he couldn't hear. "You're mad at me-"

"Well I wonder why?" he cut off, crossing his arms.

"See! You're mad, which means you won't be fair to me! You won't see my side!"

Jake took a step forward, but Sam made a noise in the back of his throat, twitching his ears. Jake stopped, looking at Sam.

"Fine." Jake said. "You bring her home." he turned his gaze to me, pointing his finger. "But as soon as you get home, we are definitely talking."

I peered at him over the top of Sam's hair.

"Yes, Jake." I said, then watched as he turned and left. When he was gone, Sam disappeared behind the rock, then appeared again with pants. He walked over to me, and I stepped into his arms for a real hug. "I'm scared."

"Scared of what?" Sam asked, rubbing my back gently. Some people thought Sam was a hard, cold man. But he had a soft side that not all people got to see.

"That Jake won't see my side. That he's not going to care about how I feel."

"If Jake is half as smart as I think he is, he'll understand." Sam told me. "He really cares about you, and if this is something that really upsets you, I'm sure he'll listen."

"But what if he doesn't? What if he kicks me out because I was almost attacked his girlfriend!"

Sam chuckled at that, but I didn't see what he found so funny. There was nothing funny about being kicked out of your own house.

"Jake will not kick you out. Not for almost attacking his girlfriend. He might have something else in mind for that," he hinted. "There is a treaty between the Cullen's and us. You can't just run around attacking them because you have negative personal feelings towards them. Just like you can't attack people in general."

"I wasn't going to attack her!" I defended. "I was just going to knock her down and . . . bite her a few times . . ." I trailed off.

Sam just smiled and ruffled my hair.

"Come on, we better head back. It's about an hour back walking."

I slipped my hand into Sam's and we began heading back towards home.

**Hey everyone, just wanted to let you know I opened a poll up on my page for anyone interested in Supernatural fanfics. **


	9. Aftermath

Chapter 9:

"What's going to happen to me now, Sam?" I asked as we walked through the woods. The sun was beginning to set, hiding behind the mountain and casting a red haze across the sky.

"Most likely nothing. At least not yet. You're still quite young, Kia. To have you running with the Pack at such a young age-you just aren't ready."

"I could run with you if I really wanted!" I protested.

"You _could. _However, having you in the Pack right now is not in your best interest. If I know Jake, he won't have you doing anything more than attending meetings and doing physical training, if that." Sam brought his hand up to scratch his head. "He'll want to start preparing you for when you are ready to join."

We walked in silence for a few moments. I had a question that I wanted to ask Sam, but I wasn't really sure if I wanted to know the answer to it or not. I glanced up at him, then back to the front.

"Sam?" I caved, "When-When you guys were all phased, did Jake . . . Did Jake think about anything? Like, what he was going to do with me?"

Sam looked down at me. Sam was the only one in the Pack that knew about Jake spanking me. At least, that I knew of anyway. Sam even spanked me once before too. But that was because I did something to directly offend him, and it was between the two of us.

"Jake has learned how to keep his thoughts in check while being phased. But the entire Pack knows when you've done something to piss him off. He'll pick a phrase, usually something along the lines of, 'I'm going to kill her', or 'She's only eleven', and repeat it over and over in his head."

I let out a relieved sigh. I'd rather Jake go running around saying that he was going to kill me, rather than that he was going to spank me.

"Do you think I'm a bad person for hating Nessie?" I asked, also fearful for his answer. "Does it make me a bad sister?"

"Kia," Sam started, "this is how I look at it. Vampires have been our enemies for centuries. The Cullen's are a special case, we have an alliance and an agreement. That doesn't mean we have to like them. But we do have to get along. Not liking someone doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But you can't run around acting on those opinions. Have you ever heard the term, 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'?"

I nodded, looking up at him intently.

"It is your choice whether or not you _like _Nessie. That does not make you a bad person, and most certainly does not make you a bad sister. But that is something you need to keep to yourself, or between you, Jake, and Nessie. It's not something you should run around yelling or making a scene about."

"I didn't mean to! I couldn't help myself, it was like there was this rage inside of me and I couldn't control it!"

"The nature of the beast," Sam smirked. "We've all felt it before. That is also something you will learn to control. You're not plain old Kiana Rose, anymore. You're Kiana Rose, the girl, and Kiana Rose, the wolf. Now you have two different personalities within you. The girl part, and the wolf part. Does that make sense?"

"Yes. But I don't understand . . . Why didn't Jake tell me all this before I turned?" I implored. "If he thought there was a chance, why didn't he warn me? He let me go into it blind and see what happened? I clearly don't know how to deal with it! All he cared about was making plans to protect Nessie!"

I started crying again, pulling my hand out of Sam's so I could cover my face. I had stopped walking. Sam placed his hands on my shoulders and squeezed them gently.

"I know you don't, and yes, it is Jake's responsibility not only as Leader, but as your brother, to prepare you for this. But it is also impossible for him to let something threatening Nessie, to happen without him doing something about it. It's part of being imprinted."

"So I'm always going to come second to Nessie?" I wailed, taking my hands away from my face. Sam pulled me into a hug.

"No, we won't let that happen. You will tell Jake exactly how you feel, and I'll be right there with you."

"Promise?" I sniffled.

"I promise."

~.~

When we finally got home, it was night time. The moon was in the sky and the stars were shining brightly. The kitchen light was on and I could see Jake through the window, doing something that looked like making dinner. My stomach rumbled, and I realized just how hungry I really was. I hadn't eaten since breakfast, since I had to skip out on my lunch.

I hesitated at the front door, glancing to Sam with wide, worried eyes. He nodded to me and opened the door. I was expecting Jake to come storming out of the kitchen, waving his finger at me and yelling. Instead, he poked his head around the corner and said,

"Just in time. Dinner's ready."

He didn't sound or look angry at all. I kicked my shoes off and headed for the kitchen, followed by Sam. The smell of dinner made it's way to my nose as I entered the kitchen, making my stomach rumble again. Jake was pulling some chicken out of the oven. Mashed potatoes sat in a bowl on the table, next to corn, and a plate of bread.

I almost started crying, because chicken with mashed potatoes and corn was my favorite meal, and Jake knew that. There was already a glass of milk at my place on the table, and Sam sat down with a beer from the fridge. I looked at the mashed potatoes with watery eyes, willing myself to keep it together. It was just a dinner, after all.

Jake came over with a plate of chicken and sat down.

We started to serve ourselves, no one saying anything. Not until a few minutes into eating had gone by, which I had spent mostly pushing the food around on my plate, too troubled to start eating.

"Kia, eat your dinner." Jake ordered, his tone calm. I glanced up at him through my lashes, meeting his steady gaze. I speared a piece of chicken on my fork, then brought it to my mouth, chewing slowly, all the while keeping eye contact with him. He had looked back to his plate and was eating his food. I looked over to Sam who was taking a swig of his beer. He winked casually at me, then set his beer down and continued to eat his food.

"I thought we were going to talk as soon as I got home." I said after a few more moments of silence.

"I changed my mind." Jake replied. I huffed and stabbed another piece of chicken.

"Well, why can't we talk about it now?"

"Because I'm not ready."

"I'm ready." I grumbled, pushing my food around my plate once more. I could feel Jake's stare boring into the top of my head as I glared down at my plate. "And I think that since I'm the one who changed today, by myself, I might add, I should be allowed to talk about it when I want to."

I guess you could say that with Sam here, I was feeling a little bold.

"Well, I think that since I'm the adult, and you're the child, that it's my decision when we're talking."

"That's stupid!" I argued. "Just cause you're an adult, doesn't mean anything!"

I glared down at my plate, waiting for Jake to say something, but he just continued to eat his dinner. Why was he being so stubborn? Couldn't he see that I wanted to talk? That must have been a first time. I was always trying to avoid talks.

I slammed my fork down on the table and stood up.

"I'll be in my room when you're ready to talk!" I snapped as I pushed my chair back. I think Jake opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. I didn't stick around to find out. I stomped out of the kitchen and down the hall to my room. I made sure to slam my door really hard, so he knew how angry I was. Though, technically, I wasn't really supposed to do that. One time I slammed it so hard it put a crack in the wall above my door. Jake threatened to take my door away from me if I ever did it again.

I went over and sat down on my bed right against the window so that I could look out. I maybe sat there for a few minutes before my door opened and Jake appeared in my doorway. He didn't say anything for a moment, and I lowered myself from my knees onto my butt with my legs crossed. I watched him intently, waiting for him to say something.

"Will you come out to the living room so we can talk?" he asked after letting out a resigned sigh. I gave him one of those long hard looks, as though I were seriously considering it, then let out a small sigh of my own, as though it were a huge pain for me to have to get off my bed and follow him out to the living room, where Sam sat on one of the couches.

I was glad he was still there.

I sat down in one of the arm chairs, folding my legs up underneath me and crossing my arms. Jake sat on the couch adjacent to me, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and hands folded together. He looked down at his hands for a moment, before looking up to meet my cool gaze.

"Kia, I'm sorry." He said and I could see in his eyes that he really meant it. I could feel my mouth drop open in shock. That wasn't anywhere near what I was expecting to hear from him.

"Sorry?" I demanded. "You're sorry? I thought you were going to kill me! I thought you were so mad at me that you couldn't wait to yell and tell me how wrong I was and stupid and-"

"What? No, Kia . . . For one, you're not stupid, so don't ever say that, and two, you're making it sound like I enjoy yelling at you."

"Well sometimes it seems like you do. I do one little thing wrong and you're instantly ready to let me know. You know, sometimes I feel like you're trying to act more like my dad than my brother, lately! And that's not fair, Jake! I already lost my dad, I don't need to lose my brother too! I'd rather have you as my brother than a dad!"

"I know-"

"No, you don't know! You don't know anything! All you're concerned about lately is stupid Nessie-"

"Watch it." Jake snapped. "You may not like her, but just like with anyone else, you won't call names."

I glared at him.

"You're so concerned, that you can't even listen to me without defending her! I'm your sister! When do you ever defend me! Why don't my feelings matter?"

"I never said your feelings don't matter, Kia! When did I ever say that? If you can give me a specific example, then by all means, enlighten me."

I placed my hands on the arms of my chair, leaning forward as my anger bubbles up and my heart raced.

"You didn't have to say it! Your actions speak loud and clear!"

Jake brought a hand up to his face, clearly frustrated. He was trying to control his breathing now. Sam was watching from the couch. I was so mad. I don't know exactly how I was expecting this to go, but this certainly wasn't it.

"You're supposed to be my brother, Jake!" I wailed, my frustration breaking me down. "You're supposed to protect me, to be there for me! When did you do either of that today, when I needed you most? Do you remember how scared you were when you changed? Do you remember how much it hurt? But you had someone there for you! You had Sam there! Imagine how it would have been to do it alone!"

Jake was staring at me, his jaw clenched. I wiped at my eyes with the back of my arm.

"You know that you could have just sent the pack to watch over the Cullen's. They could have handled it without you. Then you could have stayed with me, but you just had to be there for Nessie. You chose her over your own sister." I leaned back into the chair, feeling smaller than ever now. "You're the only person I have left, Jake, and to know that the only person I have left, won't even be there for me . . ." I trailed off. I couldn't go on anymore. I was over come with gut wrenching sobs and all I could do at that point was hold myself and cry.

The only sound in the room was me. Jake and Sam were both silent.

**Don't forget to check out the poll on my page if any of you are interested in Supernatural fanfiction. I'm thinking of bringing my Anna stories back to life! **


	10. Healing Wounds

Chapter 10:

When Jake finally said something, it wasn't directed to me, but to Sam. He turned slowly to Sam, and said in a low voice, "I'd like a few moments alone with my sister."

Sam looked at me and I shook my head through the tears.

"Sam promised me he would stay!" I blurted out. Jake looked from Sam, to me, and then back to Sam.

"Is that true?" he asked, confusion and shock in his voice.

"Yes." Sam answered. "Kia asked me to make sure that you would be fair to her. She-"

"Whoa!" Jake held his hands up. "Okay, I see what's going on here. But you don't need to worry about it, okay? So can I just have a few moments alone with her?"

"He's not leaving!" I insisted.

"Jake," Sam started, but Jake cut him off.

"Look," he sounded pretty pissed, like we were missing something important. "I get it. I understand, okay? The second I got home, Leah and Emily were both on me about the way I reacted back there. Alright? I was wrong, I said I was sorry, and I would really like some time so I can talk to my sister alone! I mean it, Sam."

Sam inhaled deeply, then nodded to Jake and stood up. I sat in my chair, holding myself even tighter as I watched him leave. Jake was standing by now, pacing back and forth before me. He looked extremely agitated and-strange. I've never seen him like this before.

I had already said all I wanted to say, so I waited for Jake. A few moments later, he stopped pacing and stood before me.

"What do you need me to do?" He asked, staring intently into my eyes. I was slightly taken-a-back, once again.

"What do you mean?" I asked nervously.

"I mean, how can I fix this?" he asked, stepping forward and kneeling in front of me. He pulled my arms away from my body and held my hands in his. "As your brother, what do you need me to do?"

I glanced away, unsure of what to say.

"I don't know." I shrugged, put on the spot. "Um. I guess . . . I just want you to spend more time with me . . . you know, without _her._ I don't want my life to have to revolve around her just because yours does." I paused, then realized once I got going, I really had a lot to say. "I hate feeling like I have to compete against her for your time. You have Date Nights with Nessie, I want _us _to have a Date Night too! I want to feel like your my brother again, the one I had before dad died! I love that you care for me Jake, but . . . Sometimes I just need you to be my brother."

Jake was nodding as I told him what I wanted. I could feel the tears flooding from my eyes as my needs were being vocalized and even validated.

"And . . . I don't want to feel like a bad person for not liking her. I need a way to deal with it, where I don't have to be forced into her company. That just makes me hate her even more. Maybe someday I will come to tolerate her, or even like her, but I can't right now, Jake. I'm sorry!"

I was crying again, and this time, Jake pulled me against him. He didn't feel hot to me anymore, but instead, the same temperature. It was a strange feeling, and it made me cry harder. I liked how Jake always felt warmer than me. It was comforting.

"I'm so afraid of losing you, Jake." I whimpered against his shoulder, as I clutched at the fabric of his shirt. Tears pooled in my eyes as I stared over his shoulder into space. "I can't lose you, too. I won't. But she's taking you! She's taking you and I had to do something about it!"

"Shh," Jake soothed as my breath hitched in my throat at the renewal of emotion at that last statement. He held me tight and rocked with me for a few moment, and when I hadn't said anything else, he said, "You are not a bad person, Kia, and I'm sorry if my reactions made you feel like you are. It was completely uncalled for and I wish I could take them all back. It just-I'm not using my imprint as an excuse, because there is no excuse for my behavior, but love will make a person do crazy things, so you can only imagine how crazy an imprint can make you. I should have put your feelings before mine though, but I was too blind to realize that."

He paused for a moment.

"I can't take back how today went, but I can promise you that from now on, it will never be like that again. If I tell you I'll be there for you, I'll be there, even if I have to die trying."

He pulled away so that he could look me in the eye.

"I love you, Kiana. You're my baby sister, and nothing will ever change that. I promise from now on to be the brother you want and need, but you have to promise me something in return."

I looked at him wearily. "What?"

"Try not to kill my girlfriend?"

I couldn't help it. I cracked a shy smile.

"I wasn't going to kill her." I insisted, tracing the collar of his shirt distractedly. "I was just going to knock her down and . . . bite her a few times."

"Oh, really? And how were you planning on doing that with fourteen other vampires there?" I shrugged.

"I guess I didn't really think that part through."

"Yeah," Jake's tone switched from light, to serious. "You could have gotten hurt, Kia."

"It was the Cullen's, Jake. They wouldn't have hurt me."

"You were aiming to attack one of their own. I think they would have protected her had they needed to." I opened my mouth to say something, but Jake held a hand up. "But that's not the point. The point is, now that you've phased, there is a whole other side to you. A side you're going to have to learn to control. I'm going to let this little mishap slide, just this once, okay?"

"Yes, Jake." I nodded, feeling slightly embarrassed.

"However," I groaned, knowing this wasn't going to bode well for me. "You broke two of our major rules today, one of them which I cannot overlook."

I bit my lower lip.

"Do you know what I'm talking about?"

I had an idea, but I shook my head anyway.

"How about this-go into the kitchen, and get the wooden spoon."

I pushed myself back, eyes wide.

"Jake, no!" I protested.

"What did you promise me the other night about putting yourself in danger?" Jake asked, his voice stern. I started blinking back tears. Great, just when I thought things were going good, Jake has to go and actually follow through for the worst thing!

"That I wouldn't do it again." I whimpered. "But Jake-"

"No buts. Kia, do you realize how dangerous running off into the woods was? What if the Volturi were still in the area? They would have killed you!"

"I was upset!" I protested.

"Yet another thing we talked about the other night. You were upset so you acted on impulse, once again, and put yourself in danger."

"Only because you were being mean to me!"

"That's not an excuse. Nothing bad would have happened to you had you not run away. Yet you ran away, putting yourself in a dangerous situation."

"I'm sorry! Jake, please! I won't do it again, I promise! Can't you just let it go for this once? This is the worst day I've ever had!"

Jake looked at me for a moment, before saying,

"I'm sorry, Kia. I can't do that. You know the rules. Now go get the spoon."

I looked at him for a moment, before jumping up and running to the kitchen, tears falling from my eyes. This was the worst day in the history of bad days. I guess the only bright side was that it could only go up from here . . . if I even survived the night.

I walked slowly over to the jar that held all the wooden spoons, and picked the one that looked the least painful. I held it in my hand, running my hand over the smooth wood. Resigning myself to my fate, I made my way back to the living room, my stomach doing flip flops.

"To your room." Jake instructed. I sniffled and walked past him to my room, carrying the spoon. I flung myself down on my bed, but didn't have much time to feel sorry for myself, because Jake came in behind me. He sat down on the edge of my bed, and told me to stand in front of him.

"Do we need to discuss this more, or do you understand why what you did was wrong?"

"I understand." I just wanted to get it over with. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hands and slowly lowered myself over his lap. "I'm sorry, Jake! I'm really sorry!"

My pleas fell on deaf ears though, as Jake's hand soon fell over my barely covered bottom. I was still wearing his shirt, which, as I bent over his lap, reached just below my butt. The shirt didn't offer much protection, and with my already emotional state, by the third swat, I was sobbing into my sheets.

Jake didn't talk much, but he reigned smack upon smack down on my backside, alternating between each cheek, and making sure to cover the entire surface of my butt. I cried into the my bed, not even bothering to try and say I was sorry. It felt as though Jake was really trying to prove a point, because he spanked me much longer than he had a few days ago. When I felt like my butt was going to fall off, and after a few times of Jake telling me to put my legs down, and holding my hand out of the way, he finally grabbed the wooden spoon.

"Kia, I'm disappointed that I have to have the same conversation with you about putting yourself in danger twice in one week. I really hope this doesn't become a habit, and I'm warning you now, the next time we have this conversation, I'm going to use dad's belt."

"No!" I gasped. Dad had a belt that he used once on Jake when he was a boy, and it really hurt! I never had it used on me, but Jake swore that thing stung like a son-of-a-bitch. Those were the exact words he used, and he even said he had to sleep on his stomach for two nights!

"Keep that in mind next time you go to do something foolish like that." He said as he lifted his shirt up so that my butt was exposed. I hid my face in my comforter, thoroughly embarrassed and dreading what was next.

The first swat with the spoon stung a lot. I grabbed onto Jake's leg with my right arm so that I wouldn't reach back. Jake didn't tell me how many he was giving me, so I didn't even know when to expect the last one. After about twelve, I broke down and began wailing, "I'm sorry! Jake p-please! Ow!"

He swatted through my pleas and ended with two stinging swats to my sit spots. He tossed the spoon aside and rubbed my back gently, pulling the shirt back over my butt.

"I'm going to try to be a better brother, and I want you to try to keep yourself out of danger. Okay?"

"Yes, Jake!" I wailed, bringing my hand back to rub my sore butt. Jake swatted my hand away, then helped me to my feet. He stood up and went over to my desk, and pulled my chair into the middle of the room. It was a wooden chair.

"Sit." He told me. I sat gingerly down on the chair. "Ten minutes." he said, then left the room.

I sat on the chair, shifting uncomfortably as I waited for him to come back in. I wiped my eyes with the back of my arm, but the tears were slowly and steadily pooling up, then sliding down my cheeks. As much as I hate getting spankings, there was a sense of relief that flooded me when it was over. It was like the slate was clean and everything between us was good again.

When Jake came back in, he had two mugs of hot chocolate. He placed them on my windowsill, and then turned to face me. He held his arms out, and I jumped up immediately, running into them. I buried my face into his stomach.

"I love you, kid." Jake said, kissing the top of my head.

"I love you too, Jake." I replied, squeezing him as tight as I could.

Jake sent me to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get ready for bed. He waited for me in my room, and when I got back, sat next to me in bed and talked while we drank our hot chocolate. It was just like old times, when Dad was still alive and he would come into my room on nights when I got in spanked to share some hot chocolate and company to make me feel better.

And I did.

**Hey! Those of you interested in a Supernatural fanfic, check my PROFILE for some info on the upcoming story!**

**GEW**


	11. Surprise

Chapter 11:

It had been one week since I phased for the first time, and I hadn't phased since then. Jake offered to bring me into the woods and run around with me, but I didn't want to. I guess some part of me hoped that maybe, if I didn't phase again, I would just go back to being normal. I spent my lunches inside, afraid that Kit would notice that there was something different about me. I stayed in the classroom with my teacher, and when she asked if something was wrong, I just told her I felt like I wasn't understanding out science unit as well as I should be, so I was using my lunch period to study. She seemed pretty impressed with that and gave me some extra worksheets the last two days of school so that I could have some extra practice. It was also a nice cover up so when my friends asked me where I'd been, I showed them the worksheets and said that Jake was making me study harder.

I'd also been going straight home after school. Jake decided that instead of going to the Cullen's after school like we normally did. Brady drove me home, and I was allowed to stay home by myself for an hour and a half while Jake was with Nessie. I had to call him when I got home, and then he would call me again when he was leaving the Cullen's. It was really nice to have that time alone, especially now with so many things changing.

Friday, when I got home from school, I sat in my bathroom, staring at my reflection. I didn't really look different. I mean, when Jake phased, he got all this muscle, and cut his hair. I still looked the same with shoulder length, straight, black hair, dark eyes, and bland as ever features. I didn't even get any muscles.

It wasn't fair. When all the boys phased, they all looked good. Even Leah had a new glow about her. I still looked like a pathetic little girl. Abby's parents let her wear make-up to school. She wore lip gloss and mascara, and she didn't look like a pathetic little girl. All the guys thought Abby was pretty. They were always asking her out, but she said she was holding out for something better-which I still think is my brother, Jake. I wanted to wear make-up like Abby did. Then maybe I'd be pretty too.

"Kiana! Kiana?" I heard someone yelling my name frantically, pulling me out of my thought. It sounded like Jake. Suddenly realizing what was going on, I jumped up and opened the bathroom door. Jake was in the living room looking around for me. "Ki-" He saw me and stopped short. I walked out, guiltily. "Why didn't you answer the phone?" Jake demanded, crossing his arms at me.

"I was in the bathroom." I told him, feeling slightly uncomfortable.

"For thirty minutes?" he asked skeptically. "I called three times in the past thirty minutes, and you didn't hear the phone go off once?"

I shook my head, avoiding his gaze. This was awkward. I didn't want him to know what I was really doing in the bathroom.

"I'm sorry, Jake." I said. "I wasn't really paying attention."

"Well what were you doing?" He asked, as though it blew his mind I could be in the bathroom doing something where I couldn't hear the phone.

"I was . . . I was . . ." Jake looked at me as if to say, 'yes, come on'. "I was doing girl stuff." I mumbled, looking down at my feet.

"You were doing-" He paused, then leaned back as though realizing something. "Oh. Okay." Now he seemed uncomfortable too. "Well, next time just, listen for the phone . . ."

I nodded, still not meeting his gaze.

"Alright, then." Jake clapped his hands together, then rubbed them. "I'm going to get dinner started. Have you started your homework yet?"

I shook my head.

"You go do that now while I make dinner, then maybe we can go catch a movie after, okay?"

I looked up, smiling, forgetting about feeling awkward. I haven't been to see a movie in forever.

"Really?" I asked hopefully.

"Yeah, but only if you start your homework. I don't want you leaving it until last minute Sunday night."

"Okay!" I sang, running into my room to start my homework. I didn't have much. A few vocab words, a little reading on Harriet Tubman, and a take home math quiz. Depending on what Jake made for dinner, I could have it all done by the time he called me to eat.

~ . ~

When Jake and I got home from the movies, it was around nine at night. We had went to see a movie called Frankenweenie. It was okay. I enjoyed spending the time with Jake, more than I really enjoyed the movie. But by the time we got home, I was feeling tired and grumpy.

"Kia, why don't you unload the dishwasher." Jake suggested when we walked inside.

"I don't want to." I grouched, kicking my shoes off and flopping down onto the couch.

"When I said 'why don't you', I really meant, 'go do it'." Jake clarified, pulling me off the couch and sending me toward the kitchen with a gentle push. I stopped a few steps out and looked back at him.

"I want to go to bed."

"You can go to bed after you unload the dishwasher."

"No! I'm tired, I want to go to bed now!" I said, stomping my foot.

"Kia, unloading the dishwasher is your chore. You know what happens when you don't do your chores." If I didn't do my chores on time, then Jake would give me two extra chores for the next two days. Usually they were really annoying things like cleaning all the windows inside and out, or mopping the floors.

"Fine!" I snapped, turning around and stomping to the kitchen. I didn't make it far before Jake grabbed a hold of my arm and gave me a real hard swat to the backside. "Ow!" I protested angrily.

"If I were you, I would knock off the attitude. Now." Jake warned. "I just brought you out to see a movie, and we had a great time. There is no reason for you to be snotty to me right now, and if that's how you're going to be, then you can stay in your room for the rest of the weekend? Is that what you want?"

I glared at him for a moment, and then slowly started realizing what was going on. I didn't really know what was going on, but I knew that I had no idea where that little burst of anger came from. I didn't want Jake to be mad at me, and I definitely didn't want to stay in my room all weekend. I sighed, looking away.

"No." I said quietly. "I'm sorry."

I could feel Jake's gaze on me, then his hand under my chin moving my face to look at him.

"Are you feeling alright?" He asked, staring intently at me.

"I'm fine." I dismissed, pulling my face out of his hands. "I'm just-tired." I turned and left to go into the kitchen so I could unload the dishwasher and go to bed.

That was weird. I'm not one to have mood swings like that, but maybe it was because of the whole wolf thing. If that's what it was, I didn't like it. As if I didn't have enough to worry about, and a hard enough time controlling my emotions, now I was having weird wolf mood swings?

I went into the kitchen, grateful that Jake didn't follow me in. I put the dishes away as fast as I could, and when I was done, I headed straight for my room. Jake was in his room, because the living room was empty.

I changed into my pajamas, then went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and comb my hair. I barely looked in the mirror this time.

I climbed into bed with my door closed and lights off. I cuddled up with my pillow, looking out my window into the sky. Jake came in a few minutes later, keeping the light off. He came over to my bed and leaned over me.

"Are you sure there's nothing wrong?" he asked gently, and I nodded. He sighed a little, as though he knew that wasn't completely true, but he didn't push the matter. "Alright. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Jake." I said as he kissed my head. He left my room, closing the door behind him. Maybe tomorrow would be better.

~ . ~

When I opened my eyes, the sun was barely coming up over the horizon. It must have been really early still, which was odd, because usually on weekends I slept until at least nine. The latest Jake would let me sleep until was ten. But normally, I wasn't up this early.

Something was wrong though. There was a reason I woke up. My stomach was bothering me, and it hurt. It was different, not like a stomach ache I've had before. Maybe I had to go to the bathroom? But it didn't really feel like that either. I shifted, moving to sit up, when I realized something felt different. My bed felt a little wet, almost sticky on my legs.

I thought I wet the bed, so with a sigh, I threw the covers back. When I threw the covers back, my eyes popped out of my head at what I saw, and then before I could stop myself, I screamed. There was blood covering the my thighs, and soaked into my bed sheet.

My door flew open and Jake came running in, flipping the lights on.

"What's wrong?" He asked, coming right up to my bed. I quickly pulled the covers back over my legs, and all I could do was stare wide-eyed at him, breathing unevenly. Jake looked from my face, to the bed, where I was holding the covers over my legs with shaking hands. "Kia," He said, his tone leve, "What happened?"

I shook my head wordlessly, still in complete shock. Jake waited a few moments for me to say something, but when I didn't he took my blankets from my hands and pulled them back.

"Jake!" I protested loudly, then before I could stop myself, I started crying. I could feel the blood rushing to my face, as his eyes reflected the surprise he felt. He was able to compose himself quickly though, and put a gentle hand on my face.

"Hey," he whispered, catching my gaze. "It's okay."

"No it's not!" I wailed. "Something's wrong with me! Eleven year old's aren't supposed to get p-p-" I couldn't get the word out. "You know!"

"I'm sure it's not a big deal," Jake replied. "Come on, why don't we get you cleaned up and then you can call Emily? Would that make you feel better?"

I knew Jake was probably having a hard time with this, seeing as he was a boy and all, but he was trying for me. I nodded, and let him help me out of bed. I felt so gross, covered in blood. What was worse, was that it dripped down my leg when I moved. Not knowing what else to do, I held my night gown against it. This was the last time I was ever sleeping without underwear. I half waddled to the bathroom, trying to keep the blood from flowing, and stood in one spot while Jake turned the shower on.

When it was ready, he left, and I pulled my nightgown off and stepped in. The water that ran off had a pale pink tint to it, and I felt slightly queasy. The weird part was while I was in the shower, nothing came out. Jake put some clean clothes in the bathroom for me, and when I got out, I stuffed a bunch of toilet paper in my underwear, for lack of anything better to use.

I slowly made my way out to the kitchen, where Jake was sitting at the table. He handed me the phone and I dialed Emily's number, but paused before I pressed call.

"Jake, what if she doesn't want to talk to me about it?" I asked. "What if it's too gross?"

"I'm sure she'll talk to you." he assured me. I still hesitated.

"Jake?" I said after a few moments.

"Yeah?"

"Can you-Can I have some privacy?" I was already embarrassed enough as it is, and having Jake-a boy-listening to me talk about it, was more than I could handle.

"Oh, yeah. Sure." He stood up from the table and headed out into the living room. I pressed call, hoping that they would pick up.

"Hello?" Sam's sleepy voice answered.

"Sam? It's Kia. Is Emily there?"

"Kia? Is something wrong?"

"No, I just have to asked Emily something."

There was a small shuffling noise, and then Emily's tired voice answered.

"Kia, are you okay?"

"I'm okay." I answered, then before I could chicken out of saying anything, I said, "Emily, I just got my period and . . . I don't . . . I'm not . . . Is something wrong with me? I'm only eleven!"

"You-Oh, wow." She said, sounding a little more awake. "No, no, there's nothing wrong with you, first of all. Some girls get their period early, it's nothing to worry about. I didn't get mine until I was thirteen, but my cousin got hers when she was in fifth grade. Have you had any health classes where your teacher talked about your period with you?"

"No." I replied.

"Alright. Well, the drug store isn't open yet, so we can't go buy you anything until it opens in a few hours. Why don't you go back to sleep and I'll come over around nine, then we can go out and I'll help you get everything you need. Sound good?"

"Yes." I said, feeling better. "Thanks, Emily."

"Anything for you, Kia. I'll see you in a few hours, okay?"

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

I put the phone back on the charger on the counter, then went out to the living room. Jake was sitting on the couch, propping his head up with his elbow on the arm rest. I sat down next to him and snuggled into his side. He peeked out of his lids at me.

"How'd it go?"

"Good. Emily is coming over this morning to bring me to the store."

"Oh good. So we can go back to sleep now?"

"Um. Well, my bed is kinda . . . gross."

"Oh, right."

Jake and I went into my room and stripped it clean. Jake said there wasn't really anything we could do for the mattress but scrub it with some water. That stain would be there pretty much forever. At least my sheets would clean in the wash.

Jake agreed to let me sleep on the couch because I was too grossed out to sleep in my bed while the mattress dried from scrubbing. Besides, I was still a little too awake to fall asleep, so he let me turn the tv on and watch it with the volume low. It wasn't long, maybe two or three episodes of late night tv and I was able to fall asleep again.


	12. Black Dawn

Chapter 12:

When I woke up the next morning, Emily was sitting at the kitchen table with Jake, and to my surprise, Leah. I rubbed my eyes, then stretched, yawning big. Suddenly, I tensed my body as I felt the unfamiliar sensation down below, which was my period. I quickly jumped up and ran to the bathroom, hoping that I was about to start leaking all over the floor.

When I sat down on the toilet, I was shocked to see that there really wasn't that much blood. To me, it felt as though I was just peeing out blood. This was very strange. I didn't like this one bit. Was this how it would be for the rest of my life? Awkwardly feeling like I was peeing for an entire week as I walked around, trying to go through my normal life?

I rubbed my nose in frustration, then quickly switched out the toilet paper, and headed into the kitchen. When I walked in, Jake, Emily, and Leah all stopped talking, and looked at me. I stopped, looking around the table at them, feeling like a bug under a magnifying glass.

"What?" I wasn't sure if I really wanted to know the answer to that question.

Jake glanced at Leah, who raised an eyebrow at him and gestured with her head to me.

"What's going on?" I pushed, starting to feel nervous. "Did something happen? Is something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, sweetie," Emily said, holding a hand out. "Why don't you come sit with us?"

"No." I said, shaking my head as I took a step back out of reach. "I'm not sitting down until you tell me what's wrong. I know it's something, I'm not stupid!"

Jake brought his hands up to his face and rubbed them up, then down, before plopping them back down in his lap.

"We don't know for sure if there's something wrong . . . And even then, it's not really a bad thing."

"So just tell me what it is, Jake!" I snapped, starting to get irritated. Jake looked at Emily and Leah once more, then let out a sigh, pushed back from the table and walked towards me. I took a hesitant step back, but he reached out and grabbed my shoulder.

"Let's go outside." he suggested, turning me towards the front door. I drew my brows together, confused, and glanced over my shoulder as I began walking outside, seeing Leah and Emily following. I could feel my heart starting to beat a little faster. What in the heck was going on?

When we were in the yard, closer to the woods than to the house, Jake stopped. Emily and Leah held back, watching.

"Jake-"

"Phase." Jake ordered. I tilted my head to the side.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I said so. Do it now."

"But I don't want-"

"Do it!" Jake snapped, and I jumped. I stepped back, looking at him, feeling as though he just slapped me. He knew how I felt about this. He knew I didn't want to. I wanted to argue with him, but I was afraid. I took another step back, taking a deep breath, then letting it out slowly.

I closed my eyes, imagining myself as a wolf, remember the sensation of what it was like to phase.

I opened my eyes and looked down. I was still me. I closed them, trying again. I clenched my jaw and squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to change.

When I opened them again, I was still me. I looked at Jake, my eyes wide, tears starting to form.

"I'm trying, Jake!" I promised. "It's not-I can't do it! I'm sorry!"

Jake walked towards me quickly, and I stood there frozen to the spot, wondering what he was going to do when he reached me. Instead of grabbing me and yelling, shaking me, telling me how terrible of a wolf I was, he wrapped his arms around me, lifting me into the arm, holding me tight.

"Oh thank God." He said against my hair.

"W-what?"

Jake set me back down and Leah and Emily came running over.

"What's going on!" I yelled suddenly, feeling lost. "I want to know, right now!" I stomped my foot in emphasis.

"Honey, you're not a wolf anymore!" Emily told me, smiling. "When I told Sam about your period-"

"You told Sam?" I groaned, covering my face. Great, now everyone in La Push will know I got my period.

"Well, yes. But that's not the point. When I told Sam, he mentioned to me that he heard Leah say how when she phased, she stopped getting her period."

"Okay?" I said, slightly lost.

"It means that, if you were a wolf, you wouldn't have gotten your period at all. So somewhere between phasing for the first time, and now, you reverted back to being only human, and because of this change, it must have kick started something inside you and caused you to get your period early." Leah clarified.

"So . . . So you're saying . . . I'm normal?" I asked, looking directly at Jake.

"Yeah," He smiled, nodding his head. "You're normal."

I stood there, letting it sink in. Normal. No more phasing into a big hairy wolf. No more brain connections to the Pack. No more split personality. But that also meant, no more warmth. No more being included in what was going on in the Pack. But those were small prices to pay.

I looked at Jake with tears springing into my eyes once again.

"You don't mind," I asked. "That I'm not a wolf anymore? You're not disappointed?"

"Disappointed?" Jake repeated, kneeling down in front of me. "Baby, I'm so happy, you don't even know. I didn't want this life for you. It's not a bad life, but," he shook his head. "I didn't want my baby sister to be a part of it."

I let out a breath, a smile spreading. I ran into his arms, nearly knocking him over. We were both laughing and smiling as I wrestled him to the ground. I didn't care that I was feeling uncomfortable right now. I welcomed it. I would rather feel this once a month, than be what I was.

When we ceased our wrestling, I got serious.

"But why did I turn back? How could I? None of you did."

"We have a theory, but we're not entirely sure. We think it's because after the first time you phased, you never phased again. When we all phased, we phased again within a few hours." Leah explained.

Jake wrapped his arm around me and kissed the top of my head as we headed back towards the house. I snuggled into his side, smiling to myself.

For a while, it wasn't easy being the younger sister to an Alpha wolf. For a while, I thought that my life was over. But I would never change having Jake for a brother. And I realized, my life wasn't over. It was just beginning.

END

* * *

_Authors Note: So, I know some of you are probably yelling at the computer screen and cursing my name, but I can assure you, that this not the end, it is only the beginning ;)_


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